


Noteworthy

by 1984winstonandjulia, msarahv



Category: Days of Our Lives
Genre: Coming Out, Letters, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-01
Updated: 2015-04-18
Packaged: 2018-02-19 13:12:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 23
Words: 37,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2389526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1984winstonandjulia/pseuds/1984winstonandjulia, https://archiveofourown.org/users/msarahv/pseuds/msarahv
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Will and Sonny start a correspondence, but will they ever meet?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Will looked through the window at the patterns the raindrops were creating. His coffee cup lay empty next to his hand but he didn't ask for a refill. It would mean looking at the counter, past the happy couple snuggled on their seat and that would hurt too much. He noticed couples now, more than before, as if his eyes had been re-programmed. He didn't get it, why couldn't he make it work, ever? Well, he did, look at his parents... But there were couples that stayed together, he'd met them. Maybe he was broken. He had stopped asking Gabi for explanations. She didn't answer his texts anymore. How could he learn from his mistakes if he wasn't told them? He'd been attentive and romantic and respectful, but she wanted something else, so he had made the effort but it hadn't counted. His eyes followed the passers-by as they walked past the window, under big umbrellas, talking with friends or on the phone. They wore rain coats most of them, except for the handsome man running to catch his bus. Will didn't like to admit it when he thought that about a guy, but frankly, couldn't you just think a guy is good-looking, if it was the truth? He stayed there a little more, lost in his thought, taking a much-needed break for the stress of studies and families obligations. He had found this place and he wouldn't share it for now, even with his sister. She was in her fast-food phase anyway. Being a way bigger brother meant feeling so much love but still being different and disconnected from what she went through, and he felt different enough as it was.  
  
The rain had stopped and his alarm rang for his next class, so he ran outside.  
  
It was later in the day, when it started pouring that he was reminded of something. His umbrella, folded neatly at his side, against the window pane in the coffee place. By the time he got home he was drenched. That's what moping did to you, made you forgetful. He hopped in the shower, freezing.  
  
Two days later, he finally found time and headed to the shop. He didn't have much hope. He should have bought a new umbrella, but this one came from his grandmother and it had value in his heart. He had to try. He walked to the counter and waited. The barista turned to him, grinning. He started describing the object and her smile grew bigger. She walked to the back and came back with it. Will was quite happy and ordered his usual black coffee. He put the umbrella on his lap this time. As he did, he felt a paper under his hands. There was a note.  
  
'This is a great-looking umbrella, I hope the owner gets it back. Ma'am, I'm glad if you did.' Will chuckled. Ma'am, thank you for the compliment. It was a lady's umbrella, true but he still wanted to set things straight, so he fished in his backpack for his notebook and wrote 'Thank you so much. I got it from my grandmother. Not a ma'am myself! Thank you for the note though, glad to know there are nice attentive people around.' He added 'Will.' to emphasize his masculine identity and went back to the barista. "If you come across the person who brought it to you, could you give her that?" "Oh, sure! Although it's a he." "Oh, OK!" looks like they were both wrong. Will walked outside, laughing, which was welcome as he was going to his mom for the weekend and things were rather tense.  
  
He was back on Saturday night, teeth clenched, anger boiling in him so much he almost didn't need to drink something warm. He still ordered, needing comfort from a mundane habit. He had listened to his mother talk for two hours and it had made her eight-year-old daughter look awfully mature in comparison. He had ended the conversation by stating "Mom, if you wanted the right to be jealous of Rafe's new woman, you should have chosen to stay with him. You can't expect every man you've dated to still be thinking about you and have no love life ever. Why can't you be content with the man you're with now?" Her answer had been twisted, with mumbling about how he couldn't understand and "it's the principle". Of course, said by a woman who made a habit of cheating and leaving her companions, it was rich. But no, her ex-husband had to mourn her, apparently and become a monk, while she could have who she wanted, at the moment, and still be worshiped somehow.  
  
He took a calming breath. The barista brought his coffee, then he stood there and asked "Hum, sir, you said your name was Will didn't you?" "Yes." "Are you the one with the umbrella?" Will frowned. What was that man talking about? "It's just that we've got this note a customer gave us and it's written on top of it : for Will and his umbrella." Will's polite smile turned thoughtful and he nodded "Yes, that's for me, I think."  
  
'I am sorry to have shown any prejudice. I actually like that umbrella. I like antiques a lot and this one is a gem. I hesitated I must admit to return it. It would have been great among my furniture. But I have a standard when it comes to ethical behavior even for little things like that. Are you a forgetful person? Or were you distracted? I have never lost an umbrella but my father always does so my mom buys them in bulks at the dollar-store. She can afford expensive one but what's the point? I'm a guy too, my name's Sonny. Thanks for the reply to my note, it brightened my stressful day. Take care.'  
  
Will stared at the paper, then closed his eyes. A few lines had calmed his feverish brain and taken over his obsessing over his mother's words. It was something to be grateful for. He looked for his notebook but couldn't find it. He was about to reluctantly ask for a sheet of paper when he spotted a pile of napkin on the next table. He would have to write very small but it was doable.  
  
'I am thrilled to meet (well, almost meet) with a pillar of morality. It was the first time I came to that shop and I was quite stressed too, hence the forgetting act. My mother is very prone to it, though and I can remember late evening, freezing our asses off, as we waited for someone to bring the key apartment to us, or even the locksmith. Of course you could see this as a giant handkerchief and a way to get your attention if I was female. Unless you're into guys.  
  
I do hope you've been using all your virtues efficiently and are working in a fulfilling job. I'm a student myself, still looking for my path. As it happens, the timing of your second note was perfect and helped me feel a little better at a bad moment. So thanks. Will'  
  
He felt embarrassed to give it to one of the employees. He took another napkin, just wrote 'Sonny' (it was such an unusual name it couldn't reach the wrong person) and went to pay his coffee. There was a napkin dispenser. Will took the makeshift envelope and managed to stick it at the bottom. Chances were few this Sonny guy would see it, or that it would still be there to be found, but it was funny and Will felt equal to go back to him mom's place and not yell in frustration at what she could say next.  
  
It took him a week to be back. It was a dad weekend this time, which meant being questioned about his mom, but thankfully not all day long. Lucas was sending him weird looks, though and Will was wondering how his watching TV could gather those. He grinned at the original barista and waited at the counter, nonchalantly scanning every inch of the flat surface. He felt disappointed, as if a new friend had let him down. In fact the fact that he only had a first name to deal with, meant that he could picture Sonny the way he wanted. It involved a very nice neck and chest, but that was normal, Sonny was basically saying he was perfect, and that could involve how he looked too.  
  
The young woman handed him his coffee and his change and he moved to get to a table when he saw it, staring at him in the most obvious way. He snatched the paper from the menu holder and sneakily walked to a remote corner. It was a good moment, that he wanted to savor...


	2. Chapter 2

'I'm a student too, majoring in business. But I'm an entrepreneur and soon I'll be securing promising opportunities. As it happens I am into guys. But I'll clear you from the charges of trying to get my attention because it seems we never come in here at the same time. Plus I guess you're straight and have a nice girlfriend.' Will closed his eyes and rubbed them. If he started correcting him, he would be opening up about his most personal feelings to a stranger. Although there was an appeal in that. He read the note on 'I prefer to focus on work myself and make plenty friends. I hope what was stressing you has stopped. Take care. Sonny.'  
  
Will didn't really feel better this time. More fidgety and frustrated. He could get up and leave and forget the incident but his mind didn't like the idea. Besides what did he have to lose? It was funnier than therapy. Having a shrink for a grandmother made it impossible to consider anyway, especially as, even though he loved her to pieces, he could see that she was far from leading a perfect life either. Perfect... This guy was cocky, that was for sure. Will tapped the tabletop with his fingertip, drumming his melancholy. The notebook was placed on the flat surface, two sheets of paper were taken out, his pen had started writing and that's when he realized what he was doing.  
  
'OK, here's the thing. My girlfriend just broke up with me. So, I'm a mess, especially as it was my fault she left and I'm trying to figure out why. Consider yourself lucky not to have feelings for anyone in particular. In my experience it sucks. Not that I want to be a downer, but at the moment, between that and my parents, I feel a little lonely. Most of my friends are out of town, studying in other colleges or even abroad. I envy people who make new friends easily. Are you sure you're as perfect as you describe yourself? I'm sure you have plenty flaws. To make you confess I'll start with mine : I'm kind of a coward. Not physically, but when it comes to what other thinks about me. Which is good because you've never seen me, so you can't judge me...' This was getting longer and longer. He used one of the side of the paper he planned on using as an envelope. He scribbled 'Take care as well, Will.' and folded the whole.  
  
The barista was busy. He put the note under the napkin dispenser again and walked to the door. Once outside, he shivered and realized he had forgotten his jacket. He was really losing it. He walked back in and looked at the counter in passing. There was a brown-haired customer seated on a stool, waiting for his coffee. His hand was playing with the dispenser and Will saw him take the note and read the name on it, then put it in his pocket. Will's heart started beating of excitement and he approached. The man looked a little too old to be a student. Will wondered, then realized the man might have made everything up. He asked anyway, pointing to the dispenser "Excuse-me? Is your name Sonny?" "Yeah, that's me." The voice was rough and the tone disagreeable. Will looked away, to the barista who was bringing the man's cup. On it you could see a big "Gary" in marker. Will turned to the man's face, frowning. The guy sheepishly took out the note and put it back, then moved away from the counter. Will watched him leave the coffee-shop, thoughtful. The counter wasn't a good idea. Where could he put it, that it wouldn't get thrown away?  
  
He walked back to his booth seat. It was fastened to the wall and behind the cushions there was a flat metallic bar. You would have to look for it there, but would Sonny think of that? As Will looked up, his eyes met the barista's. She was smiling and nodded. Will let the paper fall, letting her see where, then quickly stepped out.  
  
It struck him, as he was driving to his dorm room, that she actually knew how both of them looked. He could ask her but he liked the mystery. With cell phones and the internet, you always knew everyone's whole life. And he remembered acutely his disappointment when seeing the guy. It was a good thing it wasn't really him. Sonny... Sunny... Well, now he was back in his room and studying was taking over.  
  
He had spent the last days looking at guys in the hallways. Sonny was a student, it was possible he was one of the man he walked past, after all they both went to the same coffee-shop. It was situated quite far from campus. All this ogling was creating strange things in his chest. He was the first to admire feminine beauty, the aesthetic of a dress, but looking at guys was quite weird, even if it was compelling. Of course it would be, guys weren't made to be looked at by other men. Even the economic teacher with his adorable freckled face and his red bangs. Each time he walked to his whiteboard, the whole bench behind Will, filled with girls, would let out a collective sigh. Will always repressed his.  
  
But the teacher canceled his class that day and Will found himself with time on his hands. He drove slowly, wondering if he would ever come face to face with Sonny. Who knows, maybe today...  
  
He went straight to the booth and gestured to the barista. She gave an efficient nod. He ordered plain black Joe, so he could be a "regular" now. He looked around, at the other regulars, at the sunny deserted sidewalk. He was the only male as far as he could see, so no, not today...  
  
When he had played with his own impatience long enough, he let his fingers roam in the gap behind his head. There was a paper. It could be the one he left, he reflected. He closed his eyes, feeling ridiculous and excited. He took a peek and saw a W. Yes!  
  
The paper was folded a lot. It turned out to be quite a long read.  
  
'Wow, looks like you have a lot on your plate. I'm very happy to lend an ear... well in a manner of speaking. I've just spent the last days asking my friends and family what my flaws are. So now, I'm depressed too... OK, I'm kidding, but to sum it up, I have learned that I can have a nasty temper at times, that I can't dance to save my life (and for a gay man and his love life, that is a big flaw) and that I talk too much. Does that make you feel better? I hope you'll appreciate me humiliating myself so that you can have a laugh. In regards to your flaw, I'd say it's an understandable one. When you care for people, you want them to love you. But are you sure they wouldn't accept you if you acted more genuinely? Just a thought, as I've been there. So no judging, although I'm curious. What is your uneasiness about? I promise I won't mock you.  
  
Take care, Sonny.  
  
PS : just to say, I think you have your chances with the barista. She told me you looked dreamy.'  
  
Will blushed so hard, he felt all warm. He was flattered but he tended to be modest about his looks. Few women had shown any interest in him, so he assumed he must not be very attractive. If he compared himself to all the hot guys he had looked at in campus... He hesitated, then took his notebook and wrote:  
  
'Thanks for the tip, man, but I'm not over the break-up yet. My mother had me dance with her at all her weddings so I'm OK at it, I guess. I don't know if you talk too much, but you have a great sense of humor, so I'm sure it makes up for it. I'm glad you located my last note, and also that you are still writing back.  
  
OK, big breathe... It's hard for me to explain. I feel judged a lot and I don't know what I do wrong. My father looks at me like he's worried, my ex says I didn't really want to be with her, my grandmother is all concerned. My mom isn't but she's very self-centered, so... I told you before that I am lonely and don't make friends easily. I want to find some one to trust to be with, but I can't seem to be interested in the kind of woman people expect me to be with. I think that is what went wrong with my girl friend. She's really great and I thought we had a good potential. But she kept saying I was pretending to want her or be attracted to her, that she could tell I wasn't. I don't get it. I admire her, she's so beautiful and I care for her a lot. So who should I look for, then?  
  
Wow, you're the first person I told that. It feels liberating. Thanks for that. Take care Will.'  
  
He put the paper in the cache and turned back to a black cup and a smile. The barista was as pretty as Gabi. He looked at her hard waiting for the attraction to hit him. It didn't. He bit his lip. Maybe Sonny was wrong and she had only said that in passing. He gave her a nice tip, drank his cup as fast as he could and got back to the dorm.


	3. Chapter 3

He hadn't had time to think about the note business this past week. He had had a huge fight with his mom, so much he had moved in with his dad and while it meant much more quiet time, it also meant more weird looks. He was also missing his sibling's company. In the week, the dorm was also quite silent, until Friday when all the rooms started pounding techno music so loudly that he decided to flee, to his place of contemplation, great coffee and...  
  
There were people at "his" booth. He hadn't foreseen that and he wondered if he should wait or discreetly check behind the seat. It would need too much luck. He sat at the counter and waited, shooting dark looks at the persons unwittingly preventing him access to his "mail box". It was funny, if he thought about it. He could as well give his email address, or even create a new one, but he liked it that way. It felt more real and at the same time, more private.  
  
The booth was finally emptied, so he walked slowly to it, carrying a fresh cup of coffee and a muffin. He sat, drank a little, almost burned his mouth and swore under his breath. His hand went to the cache and found the paper. He took it and stared, nonplussed. There was 'Sonny' written on it. It was his own handwriting.  
  
Now, that sucked. He had been so excited and now, he felt very alone. Apparently, Sonny had gotten fed up with their little game. Will stood up and went out. Maybe he could go to the movie theater?  
  
He went to bed slightly better but the next evening, he was back. "Hey, good to see you again so soon! The usual?" Will was glad it was the male employee he was meeting these days. He still felt a little uneasy, plus the guy was easy on the eye. He hesitated, sat down at another booth, then gave up and went to check. He took the paper. Still not a new one...  
  
He got strong and didn't come back to the coffee-house the next week. No way he was going to obsess about it. He had enough to deal with. He had decided to take the bull by the horn and asked his father what was the matter. He had answered in a cryptic way, about being cautious and that differences were could put you in danger and he didn't want that for him, so... Will had tried to understand but Lucas' phone had rung and after that, he had more or less escaped any other conversation.  
  
On Thursday evening, his mother had asked him to come meet her at his grandmother's place, "on neutral ground". They had achieved a sort of truce, but he still didn't move back. He promised to visit soon and at the end of the talk, even gave her a hug. However crazy she could get, she was still his mom and he loved her.  
  
He had four people walking up and hitting on him, including a guy. Looks like his haircut suited him. He had turned them down quite easily. He had no time for romance. He chuckled after the guy left. Looks like him going to the gym more often was showing, if even those from the other team were interested.  
  
He spent the Saturday playing with his brothers and sisters and felt relaxed and happy. Children were noisy and restless but they were awesome too. They weren't complicated and they listened to reason. He got inspired and organized a treasure hunt in the garden. With hidden notes. At the end of it, he felt resolved to face possible disappointment and he left for the coffee-shop.  
  
This time it was the young woman at the counter and he was relieved to feel equal to greeting her. She seemed polite without anything more, either. He took it as a good sign and, sure enough, his fingers felt something thicker. It was a lot of paper and a lot of words on it. He sighed of contentment and started reading while munching on his muffin.  
  
'I've just got back from a trip and I was glad to find another note. This is fun. My best friend is teasing me with this so much. He remarks we are in the digital age and I'm ridiculous, just like I am with my love for antiques. He's a great guy of course, just very eager to be "cool" at all cost. Luckily that means he's very gay-friendly. Which is good because coming out is really not easy, but I'm glad I did. I'm so much happier that way. Being yourself is a big risk and I understand that the pressure can be strong. Have you tried talking with your dad, to know what bugs him? Sometimes parents have strange expectations. Of course it's still better than them not caring. I have friend who was kicked out and it was hard for him. But when I asked him, he said he still didn't regret coming out.  
  
I'm all excited because my trip was fruitful. I'll soon start my own venture, and adventure! It's all exciting and time-consuming, I am nowhere near having a love life whatsoever. I have reached past the stage of casual dating and I've decided to wait for a meaningful connection. It's actually my new year's resolution and I'm quite serious about those, I feel they help me become a better person, you know?  
  
What about you? Any luck in that department? Or are you focused on studying? I have a feeling you're not the partying type (I might be wrong of course), although I'm sure you're quite fun. What are you hobbies? I like climbing (in a serious way, I've been all over the world) and dancing (even if I'm... creative about it) and traveling. Oh, and cooking too (Yes I'm quite the catch, thank you...).  
  
Take care. Sonny.'  
  
Will smiled widely. Sonny was so different and fascinating. He answered immediately:  
  
'Thanks for sharing all this with me. You seem like a confident guy. I don't have many goals myself, mostly try to survive the moment. But studying feels important. And you're right about me not partying a lot. I love having a good time with my close friends, but drinking heavily and trying to hit on strangers is really not my stuff. Unfortunately the other guys in my dorms do not share my views so I tend to be on my own and I still spend all my week-ends with my parents.  
  
I've got opportunities, though, a few girls trying their luck. And even a guy. I am happy to say it didn't bother me in the least. It was actually quite an ego boost. I'm aware that gay guys have high standards when it comes to looks, so... (unless that's just a preconception and in that case, I'm sorry.)  
  
I tried to get my dad to open up but he's very reluctant. Maybe he doesn't like that I don't party and enjoy college's life, I don't know. I've decided to focus on other things than his behavior. I've mended some of the problems I have with my mother and I try to spend quality times with my siblings. Do you like kids? I see they weren't in your list. Of course, I don't mean having some of your own, just hanging out with them. I like that a lot, and computers too. Yes, I'm a dork. I like all kind of sports, although climbing is not something I can do at all. My feet belong on the ground. I like listening to indie bands too. Oh and I suggest you never taste anything I try to cook, you could be poisoned. OK I'm exaggerating but it sure doesn't run in the family. I grew up on frozen food.  
  
I wish you luck on your business venture. Take care. Will.'  
  
He put the pen down and brushed the side of the paper. Maybe they should meet... Or maybe not, they were so different, Sonny would surely get bored with him. Plus he sounded busy and happy to be. Will looked around as he always did, in case he would see a young man that could be him. It was really so strange they would never meet when he came at different hours and on different days. It felt like a sign that they shouldn't try to meet, not to ruin the special intimacy they had reached that way. One that went beyond appearances or tastes and straight to the chore of their human qualities.


	4. Chapter 4

Will was off the moon when he came two days later, not expecting to find a reply so soon, and yet there was one. It was great because, even though he was now in the best term with his mom, things were falling apart with his father. Could he move twice in a month's time? Or should he live with his grandmother? Her apartment was so close to campus that he could vacate the dorm altogether. It was tempting. He wasn't feeling very much at ease with the guys he had class with, they were obnoxious most of them.  
  
There was another student in there. He was familiar to Will and when he raised his hands to greet another guy and then kissed him hello, Will recognized him. It was the man who had tried his luck with him the week before. Looked like he had found someone interested this time, someone who could be comfortable with returning the interest. Will's gut were a little uncomfortable and he saw his hand trembling on the cup.  
  
He opened the note, determined to focus on it only. It said:  
  
'Looks like we do have different tastes, but still share basic values. I don't hit on strangers either, nor do one-night stands. I like talking and getting to know a person, it feels much more rewarding. And I don't like drinking too much, I don't see the point in not remembering what you did in the evening.  
  
I won't lie, I like a guy with good looks, although I don't look for perfection either.  
  
I like kids, they're funny and innocent, but I'm not used to them as I'm the youngest in my family. My brothers are like me, quite independent, although we get on well together, whenever we meet again.  
  
I have troubles imagining not wanting to climb, but of course that doesn't mean I think you're a coward, just different. Fears are not something to be ashamed of. I get that you don't want to be heartbroken again. Maybe you could take your time to think objectively about the kind of person you want to date, sometimes it helps to assess priorities. I remember when I realized I wanted to date guys, and when later I got tired of shallow airheads (very quickly) and I resolved to date guys that had substance. Do you like sweet, soft girls or rather energetic ones?  
  
I'm having troubles with finding proper investors at the moment and it drives me nuts. I feel so near achieving my dreams! I take on myself not to be too upset but it's hard.  
  
Hope you're well yourself, take care. Sonny.'  
  
Will looked up and sure enough, the lovebirds were kissing. It was frustrating, he was sure he had moved on from being upset when viewing couples. It wasn't as if he felt he was missing out. The guy was cute, but he was a guy...  
  
He wrote in an absent-minded way:  
  
'I hope you find that investor soon. That sound so important to you. If I was loaded, I would sure help you, but I'm just a student!...'  
  
Then he stopped and put his pen down, looking through the window and taking Sonny's advice about priorities. Gabi was certainly energetic and gorgeous, she had even modeled for a while. He hadn't date her because of that, though, rather because he felt comfortable in her presence. She was a great friend. He sighed. Maybe he had to stop looking for only that. Dating was about attraction and arousal too. But he couldn't remember feeling that for any girl in a long time.  
  
He heard the doorbell cling and saw with relief that the couple was walking out, maybe to go to the movies. Or not. His mind wandered a bit, guiltily, on picturing the two in a bed. He shivered and shook his head, then returned to his writing.  
  
'… I realize when I think about it that I don't know what kind of person I'm looking for. I guess I have to learn from my mistakes and go for different and more suited to who I am. I tend to dismiss looks because I don't feel attracted to the type of woman all my male friends are into. I like a woman's mind more than her body, does that mean I'm not mature enough or something?  
  
You said you have expectations in how a guy can look, is this about the face (the eyes? I'm very partial to eyes, myself) or someone fit? I hope you don't mind the questions I am about to ask. I am asking because I am really curious not because I have any judgments. It's just that it must be so strange being gay. I mean being attracted to someone who have the same kind of body you do. Don't you feel like watching a mirror? I get that men can be attractive of course, I just don't know if you can tell the difference between wanting to look like a guy and wanting to be with him.  
  
Sorry for my ramblings, I don't want to offend you. I have lots of things on my mind and I'm trying to sort them out.  
  
I'm quite curious of the reason we never come at the same time. Are you a very early riser? I hope if we do meet one day, it won't be awkward. I feel we share a certain connection and I would hate to lose it.  
  
Take care, Will.'  
  
His hands were still trembling and he had a hard time folding the note correctly. The next time he should try decaf.  
  
One afternoon, he was at the college's library and he saw a bunch of student, looking serious with plenty books around, whispering. He knew one of them by sight, he was in his economy class. He walked to him and asked if he could sit with them, maybe they could discuss the last lecture. The guy grinned widely and started explaining the complicated notions to Will who was so focused on him, it took him a moment to notice he was being the center of attention. He blushed and shot embarrassed looks. The other guys smiled and returned to reading their notes.  
  
An hour later, they all got up and headed out. Will shook hand with his classmate and walked a few steps when he heard "Humm... Will?" He turned to the guy who had said that. He was taller than him and broadly shaped. "Yeah?" "I was wondering if... Would you like to go out sometimes?" Will pointedly ignored the burning feeling in his belly and pinched his lips "Sorry, not interested." "Oh, OK, bye then..."  
  
Will began walking again but bumped into another one of the guys. He refused again, and again to the third and fourth one. He was now feeling so awkward he wanted to go to his bed and hide under it. Instead he went to his sanctuary..  
  
He went straight to the booth, without even ordering anything. He opened the paper and read:  
  
'Yeah, I'm in such a great mood, we found investors! Now I'll be a boss... Wow, that's hard to imagine, I wonder how I'll be managing other people.  
  
It's ok, I understand that you have questions. Before I answer some of them, I wanted to suggest something, though. There is an LGBT center at the campus. You could go there and talk with them. I volunteered there for a yeah, there are very nice, laid-back people in there. I'm sure you'll love the experience and that way, your curiosity will be satisfied.  
  
As for what I look for in a guy, well I'm a brunette with brown eyes, so I tend to be a sucker for blue-eyed blond-haired beauties...' Will blushed again. It was getting ridiculous, Sonny didn't know him, he wasn't describing him. And he was certainly not a beauty.  
  
'…But that doesn't mean I always go for it. The last guy I dated had dark hair. He was very fit, but not over-muscled either. In general I'd say I like quiet intelligent guys.  
  
Remember when I said I was waiting for someone special. Well, I might have, though it's too soon to tell for sure. We're just friends at the moment, I'll see what happens, I guess.  
  
What about you? Still turning down unwanted admirers, or has it calmed down?  
  
Take care. Sonny.'  
  
Will was so flustered, he was bouncing on the seat. He got up and went nearer the counter to order coffee, but it was the male barista this time and Will stopped dead. He went back to the seat and scribbled:  
  
'I'm really happy for you, that's just great news. And I'm glad you met someone. I wish you to be right there, so that you can stop looking. Dating is so overwhelming.  
  
I don't know what the matter is, but I was asked out four time in a row by some guys I met at the library. I guess you're never sure if someone else is gay. Or if you are. I mean, it must be really hard to figure out for sure. I think I'll take your advice and go to that center. I just hope I won't get hit on there, too. But if you say they're nice people, I believe you.  
  
By the way, I've decided to move out of campus. That way, I'll be able to focus more, with no noise in the evening.  
  
Take care, Will.'  
  
He finally asked for a coffee to go, looking down all the time. He had to get past all this if he wanted to go out with his life. He thought about Sonny, who had everything figured out and apparently the perfect life. That must be why he felt a tinge of jealousy when he was reading about him meeting someone.


	5. Chapter 5

Will stood near the LGBT center, unable to find the courage to go in. There were students passing him by, talking to their friends or on their cellphones, indifferent to him, yet he felt exposed. What would they think about him? What if someone related to him learned he had been there? When it came to gossip, it was a smaller town than you would think. He wasn't afraid of those he would meet inside, though. If Sonny had volunteered there, it meant he would find kind, intelligent people. The thought did the trick and he bravely went in. There were four persons drinking coffee and listening to indie music. He recognized the band immediately and decided to use that as an icebreaker. He addressed the girl at the table and they talked for a while. She didn't ask him why he was here and he started relaxing, even when another student, a stud, joined in the conversation. He allowed himself to cast a few sideways glances and blushed each time the guy marveled at his knowledge of music. He wasn't ready to ask anything gay-related but he knew he could come back later, so that maybe one day he could.  
  
Before he did go back, he went to the coffee-house and sat, feeling confident and smiling to himself. He licked his lip, thinking about the stud he had met there. Maybe he could befriend him. What was his name already? Tyler? Yes, that was it. He took a sip of his coffee and looked at his hands. He had picked up the note without thinking. It was a new one.  
  
'Glad I could help you, Will, really. Tell me, if you go to the center, who you met there. I'll tell you if I know some of them. I had a great friend called Tracy, who always listened to obscure stuff. She's really interesting. We meet sometimes for coffee, but we're both busy. And I have new friends too, like that guy I told you about. His name is Brian. And he's very cute and funny, but I'm not sure I want anything more. He has a little too much charm, if you know what I mean. My business partner, the best friend I told you about, doesn't like him at all, he says I deserve better. So, here I am again without prospects and ready to lose myself in work again.  
  
Sorry to be all mopy, it just does some good to write about it and you seem like a kind person who would listen without getting too annoyed.  
  
I'm sorry to hear you're disappointed with dating. I'm sure you'll get your mojo back one day soon. And if girls aren't that great, there's always the other team, just saying...  
  
OK, I'm done teasing you. Hope you're fine. Take care, Sonny.'  
  
Will felt even better after reading. He took out his note pad and reread every line, chewing the tip of the pencil, to be sure to answer to everything.  
  
'I have met Tracy and we share the same taste in music, so I'm sorry to say but we're in the right and you just have no taste (who's teasing who now?). There was a Tyler too, broad shoulders and bright smile, very confident? I liked it the center, they don't pressure you or make you uncomfortable. I may hang out there some other times, you know, to talk about music.'  
  
He paused and his smile grew bigger as he wrote:  
  
'Sorry to hear that the guy was a disappointment. That's what I meant about dating. It's all so misleading. I think you got the right attitude. Let's make some friends and if something were to happen with one of them, then why not. I've decided to come out of my shell and socialize more but still be picky about who I befriend. I'm sorry I have to say this but you're setting the bar pretty high, as even just notes from you are more interesting than many people's conversations.  
  
I hope your business goes well, given your commitment to it. What is it by the way?  
  
I'll ask Tracy about you, so you better pray she says only nice things! Take care. Will.'  
  
So, he was a little nearer to knowing Sonny in person, now. It was a strange thing to feel, a mix of excitement and disappointment. He liked the charade and sense of adventure this note business carried. What if he found Sonny boring? Well, it was a risk to take and at least all of this had helped him go through his family troubles.  
  
He saw some fliers for a concert on the counter as he went to pay. The opening number was from a group he liked a lot. He grabbed one and went out, his feet light on the pavement, his face offered to the sun's rays.  
  
A few day's later, he ran into Tracy and told her about the concert. They decided to go together. They sat on a small wall, next to the building where Will had his next lecture, and chatted a while, with an ease that told Will he had made the first new friend he was looking for. "Tyler asked about you. He said you're cute." Will felt a pang in the chest and decided to change the subject quickly "Oh, I wanted to ask you. Do you know a Sonny? He said he volunteered with you a while back." Tracy's mouth turned into a smirk but she answered nevertheless "I do, yes! He's a great guy, very friendly. How do you know him?"  
  
Will was in agony. He had wanted to be the one asking, not the other way around and he was bummed on how to answer. He chose to gloss over the details "We're pen pals, but we've never met. How does he look? He won't tell me." Tracy shrugged. "Well, he's not my type, obviously, but I'd say he's attractive. Dark hair, tanned skin, he's always grinning. Very confident too, I can see him going places. And he doesn't know squat about good music." "Yeah, well, we are the elite in that matter..." Will chuckled, glad to hear Sonny was indeed a lot like his fantasies had pictured him.  
  
He changed the subject again, to majors and other school stuff and soon after, it was time for his lecture. They exchange cell numbers and as he was entering, almost bump into a guy whose face he knew. He apologized and the man crossed his arms "Heh, Will, I heard none of my friends are good enough for you. Sorry to break it to you, but playing hard to get will get you nowhere. You may be super hot, that doesn't give you the right to snub everyone." He walked to a seat, mumbling, so fast that Will didn't have the time to answer. 'I'm not gay, dude', was the first thing that sprang to mind. He felt angry at the accusations. He could choose to date whoever he liked, shaming him wouldn't make him change his mind. And none of the guys were his type anyway.  
  
He found his father talking with his grandmother when he got home. They were both frowning and looking frustrated and Will tried to reach his room unnoticed but his father spotted him. But Lucas was making efforts and he sat Will down to ask him how his love life was going, if he had met any girl... He had emphasized the last word, as if he meant someone Will would like to introduce to him. Will explained his decision to focus on work and making friends. "Friends? What kind of friends?" Will felt on the defensive and shook himself "Well, for instance I'm going to a concert with Tracy..." He didn't have to say more, his father's back reclined on the couch and he smiled warmly. Will didn't really get what was going on in his head but he didn't feel like asking.  
  
Instead, he returned to the coffee-house; The male barista greeted him and this time, Will felt equal to look at him in the eyes. They were of a nice green and were politely staring back. He listened to Will's order, nodded and turned to the next customer. Will was relieved and sat in his favorite seat.  
  
'Well, I have told you all of my flaws, remember? Plus Tracy owes me one, so I'm sure she'll say nice things (of course she's into girls so she won't gush. It's a pity, I'm very good-looking.)' Will let out a loud laugh and caught himself. This guy was really funny. He could never say that himself, even with humor.  
  
'I dated Tyler, actually. He's fun and likes to party. Maybe not exactly who you're looking for? Of course, I might be wrong and yes, now that you mention, he does have broad shoulders... Sorry, where did my mind go?  
  
Is it OK if I wait to tell you about my business venture? It's not ready yet and I don't want to jinx it. Plus I'd rather keep a little mystery...' He had added a winking smiley. Will sighed and wondered why he had.  
  
'Glad you liked the center. It's a refuge for us, somewhere to be strong and heard. I should really go and say 'hi'.  
  
Thanks for saying I'm interesting, I'm really touched. Take care. Your friend, Sonny.'  
  
The last word felt good. Will brushed the plastic table absent-mindedly, his mind so occupied that he was surprised when his eyes fell on his watch. He had a paper to finish so he really didn't have time to answer and he hesitated. Would Sonny wonder if there wasn't anything? He folded back Sonny's note and put it back behind the seat. He would have to come back the next day to write him.


	6. Chapter 6

Once he had handed in his Economic paper, Will felt better. He decided to go and say 'hi' to Tracy. He didn't have her phone number, so he went into the LGBT center but she wasn't around. Tyler was, though and he gave him a big welcoming grin. "Hey, Will, nice to see you again. How are things going?" "Fine, thanks." Will remembered what Tracy had said and flinched a little under Tyler's scrutiny. The other man didn't look very much at ease and actually looked down to ask "So, I was wondering... would you like to go out sometime? There's this great bar, a few blocks away, I'm on the VIP list and..." Will had to sit on one of the metallic chairs. His knees were giving up. He swallowed nervously and stuttered "Hum... I'm not very much into bars, sorry..." Tyler looked up, even more nervous and replied "What about going and see a movie?" Will thought about Sonny's last note, how he thought Tyler was a nice guy but superficial. Will was quite sure the guy didn't want to just befriend him. He chose to be brutally honest "Hum, Tyler, you're a great guy and you look good, but..." A flicker of disappointment passed in the man's eyes but it was so soon gone that it left Will with no guilty feelings. "Well, okay, at least I tried. You're a really nice guy, Will. Why don't you join us at the next outing the Center is planning? It's in a cabin outside of town and it won't be wild or anything. I'm sure you would have fun." Will must have looked as perplexed as he felt, because Tyler added "I'm asking 'as friend', I promise. Just think about it."  
  
When Will left the Center, he got a phone-call from his mom. She had troubles with her new boyfriend (shocker...) and needed him to baby-sit. Because of that, he didn't have time to go back to the coffee-house before the concert. He missed it, especially as he hadn't written back yet, but he promised himself he would go soon.  
  
The concert was fabulous. Tracy had taken a friend with her, at least she said she was, although Will saw the looks they were exchanging at times and smiled to himself. He didn't call her on it until Mary excused herself for a moment and Tracy asked Will how he liked the singers on the stage "I like their sound but the lyrics are a little corny." Tracy laughed "I meant, which guy do you find the most attractive?" Will frowned and said "I don't know."  
  
He changed the subject and asked Tracy about Mary. She blushed and said they were just friends for now. "You should ask her out, she looks as if she's into you as well." "You're sure?" "I think so." Tracy nodded, thoughtfully, then asked "What about Tyler, did he ask you out?" Will blushed "I said I wasn't interested and he was OK with it. He told me about an outing though." "Oh, yeah, you should come! It's very low-key and you'll meet more of us. I wish I could go, but I'm going to visit my family this weekend." "Oh." "I will send you the email with all the information. You should go, Will. Really."  
  
The next day, he was having lunch with his father when he got a text from Tracy 'she said YES thanks'. His father caught his smile "Is this your new friend Tracy? Are you guys... more than friends?" Will shook his head laughing "Oh, no. She's into girls. She's volunteering at the LGBT Center and told me about an outing..." Lucas's change of attitude is off-putting. His whole body stiffens "You told her, no, didn't you?" "I'm sorry?" "Well... why would you go? There will only be gay people there. It would make people think you're one of them." His voice is steady but Will still hears the tension in it "I'm sorry Dad, I don't get it. I've just made friends, that's a good thing isn't it? And I'm completely OK with their sexual orientations. They've all been respectful." "No...body asked you out?" "Yes, but I told them no and they didn't push." "They might this weekend. You shouldn't go, Will. Why don't you try to meet girls instead?" "Are you telling me who I should befriend?" "No, I'm not. I just want you to be cautious..." Will frowned "Do you have something against gays?" "No, of course not!" "What if I was gay, Dad? Would you throw me out?" "What? Of course not? I would still love you!" "Then, you won't mind me going there..."  
  
Will got up and went out the door. He drove to the coffee-house and sat down to re-read Sonny's last note. Then he took the other ones out of his bag and went through them too. He was shaking in anger at his dad. He had never been sure about that outing but now he wanted to go there, just because of the objections...  
  
He started writing:  
  
'Tyler asked me out, actually. I explained I wasn't interested in dating so he suggested we be friends. I mean he's very attractive but as you said I wouldn't date a superficial guy." He stopped and crossed the word "guy".  
  
He was about to write girl instead, but it didn't make sense as Tyler wasn't one. He was about to write "person", but it felt too vague somehow. He put the pen down and looked outside. There was a couple walking by, both young, holding hands smiling at each other. He closed his eyes and tried to picture himself with one of them, holding the other's hand. His eyes opened in shock.  
  
He re-read Sonny's notes and his reply and it was there, plain as day. It explained his strange feelings when he was looking at attractive men. It wasn't just uneasiness. It was attraction.  
  
He stayed there, his brain about to explode, thinking about his family, his future, who he should talk to. The LGBT Center was the perfect place of course, but there was Sonny also.  
  
'I think that I might be gay, though. It would explain a lot and also why my father is so weird, maybe he noticed before I did. He said he would still love me if I was but it wouldn't be easy for him I guess. I'm freaking out, now. I need to make sure and I don't want to go kiss a stranger for that. What do you suggest? Apart from going to the Center, because I will ask them, I just value your opinion too. Hope you find this note soon. Will.'  
  
He talked with his grandmother that night. He even used the word itself and she smiled. The next day, he looked around him, at the gorgeous girls, wearing mini-skirts, and at the good-looking guys and how could he have been so blind?  
  
He didn't feel ready to go to the Center yet. On Wednesday, he entered the coffee-house and went to the booth. He opened the paper, eyes closed, took a deep breath and read:  
  
'Well, we have never met so I couldn't be sure, but from what you said before, I am not that surprised. I suspected it, but I didn't want to be pushy or mistaken.  
  
Look at it this way, you weren't out and already guys hit on you, so at least, you won't have problems dating... And you made friends that are already out so they'll help you through this process. I certainly will. I feel we're good friends and I'm glad I can help in any way. So, you can tell me, anything, even who you intend to date! I promise I'll be happy for you.  
  
I hope your family will be OK with it, but if they don't, it's their loss. Be who you are, you'll be happier and if they really love you, that's what they want for you, isn't it?  
  
So, take extra care and know that I think of you. Sonny.'  
  
One of the tears fell from his cheek to the paper. The barista walked to him "Are you alright sir?" He nodded, then looked up at her "You've met this person I write to. Can I ask you something?" "Sure." "How come I never meet him? When does he come?" "Oh, early mornings. Just when we've opened. He doesn't come on the same days, though." Will sighed and thanked her. She shot him a concerned look, but went back to the counter.  
  
On Thursday, he signed up for the weekend outing.


	7. Chapter 7

Will spent Friday in a haze. He had a lecture in the morning, and as he had already packed for the outing, he had planned to spend his time studying or simply chilling. But every time a guy would pass him, any one of them, Will felt a shock. He wasn't attracted to all, but the simple fact that he was now allowed to fantasize about them was enough. Of course, he didn't know which ones were gay. He had met a few guys at the LGBT Center but didn't bump into them and those he had turned down before, he didn't feel he would feel up to speaking to again. The big revelation was a change but not a change either. He was still not one for hook-ups. He knew this, he was a relationship person, a committed one if possible.  
  
So, he decided firmly that he would try and befriend people during the week-end and then widen his friends' circle, until one of them appeared like someone he could date. Until then, he walked to the library, to cool down. He walked to the far end and sat, taking out his books. As he did so, he was, for whatever reason, reminded of honey. Not only the taste, or the softness, but also how it gleamed, like a golden liquid. He looked up and saw another man, a few tables down. He wasn't looking in his direction. In fact, he had a big book in front of him and was reading intently. It was his skin that had caught Will's unconscious attention. It was tan and looked soft, but enveloping lean, well-defined muscles. Will gulped. The man had a charming, open face and big brown eyes that made Will just stop studying altogether and start daydreaming. After about half an hour, the guy stretched, put the book back on one of the shelf and walked to the exit. Will was half-disappointed, half-relieved to see him go.  
  
Everyone was supposed to meet at the Center, so Will came, a little too early and walked in. There were two or three people there already. One girl was pinning a poster on the wall and one man was sitting at the table, reading a paper. He looked up and grinned at Will. He didn't look like a student and Will wondered who he was. "Hello, are you there for the outing?" "Yep, I'm Will." The man grinned "OK, hi Will, I'm Joel. I'm one of the organizers, so if you have a question, don't hesitate." Will had a question but didn't feel it was polite to ask. He circled around it "I've never seen you in here before..." "Oh, I'm not a student anymore, graduated two years ago. But I like to keep in touch with volunteers and help, here and then. I've had some great time here, found lots of friends." Will grinned. That was good news.  
  
They were carpooling and not every participant would arrive at the same time, it seemed. Joel was in charge of dispatching people into cars and was the one to call if someone got lost on the way over. He drove Will and Tyler, who seemed happy to see Will again. When they got there, they were volunteered into setting the place up and Will liked being included that way, it made him feel less nervous at being new to the group.  
  
Tyler walked to some friends of his and soon, Will was surrounded by girls. It was very relaxing, especially the fact that he knew none of them would be interested in him. Everyone around him was a stranger though, even Tyler, and he regretted that Tracy didn't come. Joel seemed very friendly but he was always busy talking on the phone. As Will came in, he heard him saying "Hey Jackson, it's been a while! Well as long as you're calling, could you stop on your way over and buy..." Will went out again, to help unload a car. More guys had arrived, they must be around fifteen people by now. The cabin was quite big, the kind that was for group renting, with a professional kitchen and a dining area. There was also a fireplace in a cozy room and dorms of two or three beds. Will found an empty one and put his duffle bag on the top bunk bed. It reminded him of boarding school. He smiled and fished out his umbrella as he noticed grey clouds gathering up. He put it next to the door and started helping in the kitchen.  
  
"Hey, Will, can you come go help outside?" Will followed Joel out but saw him turn his head and wave at a man who had just got out of his car. Will caught his breath . It was the same guy, the one from the library. He was grinning warmly and looked so fine in the setting sun that Will's legs were wobbling a little. He sighed discreetly and looked at Joel coming up to greet the newcomer.  
  
They hugged each other and Will noticed the way their hands rested comfortably against the other. They were either great friends or intimate. Will looked away. When he finally got in, the man had disappeared. Maybe he was looking for a bed to put his things. Joel was stocking sodas in the big fridge. "Okay!" he shouted to those around him "Now that Jackson is here, everyone that had signed in has arrived. If someone feels like starting the fire, there's a woodshed next to the trashcans..."  
  
Will took the opportunity. So far everyone was friendly but it felt a little bit overwhelming now. After all they were almost thirty people in there, half of which potential dating material. As he came back with the logs, he saw the Jackson man again. He spotted Will this time and his smile extended, friendly and quite gorgeous to see. It took Will about four attempts to start the fire, although he was quite good at it. He had been a boy scout at some point. "You need help?" The voice had no right to be that warm and deep. Will shook his head, feeling like a stupid kid. He didn't want to be rude, though, so he stuttered "No, thanks, it's okay, it's... it's burning now..." He was blushing, and stood up quickly, more or less running to the dining-room.  
  
Will sat next to Tyler, realizing that as hot as he could be, he didn't make Will flustered the way Jackson did. The latter was seated with Joel, chatting and laughing with his whole table. He seemed very at ease in big groups and Will felt a little more defeated. When dinner was over, everyone migrated to the fireplace, although after a while, little groups formed and people were coming in and out, even outdoors as it was warm enough. Will regretted very much that Tracy hadn't come. He didn't know anyone well enough to insert himself in one of the conversations and Tyler had migrated next to a cute guy and was now making googly eyes at him. Will walked back and forth, but his eyes were regularly drawn to a specific figure by the fire-place. After a while, he decided to go to bed and went to the dorm.  
  
The bottom bed was made now and there was a green duffle bag sprawled on it. Will had no idea who it belonged too. He prepared for bed and climb the ladder. He wasn't tired enough, so he shuffled through his bag and retrieved Sonny's notes and letters. Each time he read them, he relaxed and felt at ease. He should really meet him, he decided, he could use an actual friend, not just a mystery correspondent.  
  
He had dozed off after all, and woke up with a start. There was a soft sound, someone breathing underneath. Will was curious to know who his temporary roommate was but he was lying too comfortably and his eyelids were heavy.  
  
When he woke up, he was alone again. Feeling full of energy, this time, he jumped down and dressed up quickly. He had been explained there was no fixed schedule, just everyone hanging out and having a good time ("but we keep it classy" Tyler had added and winked at Will who had chuckled.) so he wasn't fazed by how late he had slept.  
  
He caught a cup of coffee and grabbed the bacon and eggs that were handed to him by a short guy with a nice smile and walked to a table, a spring in his step. He took a sip and marveled at the taste of the coffee, then looked around. This time he felt a tidal wave go through him. How a shy smile could create that, he had no idea. The man didn't look threatening and was seated at the other side of the room but Will saw him stand up and walk in his direction.  
  
"Hey, Will, right? Joel told me you were new. This seat taken?" Will's brain was blank on one side and boiling on the other. He mumbled "yeah... no... I mean, I have to go..." and hated himself as he was, a minute later, back in the room. He needed to calm down before going out again. His heart was beating too fast and he was freaking out. He had no car of his own, or he would have driven back home fast. He was as much afraid by his physical reaction as to the idea of giving up and not make the friends he really wanted to make. So, he settled to pacing and freaking out.  
  
A few hours later, there was a knock at the door "Will you're there?" "Yes, come in" It was a blonde girl he knew by sight but couldn't name at all "Hi, I'm Tonya! We're making lunch. You want to come help?" She was looking at him with kindness and Will felt she had been sent there, probably by the very efficient Joel. He nodded and followed her.


	8. Chapter 8

Preparing lunch was hell for Will. Jackson was always around, looking more gorgeous than the day before, wearing jeans that left nothing to the imagination. Will had quite a good one but he was chickening out at the idea of talking to him. Each time he did gather the courage, somebody was talking to the guy, or calling him elsewhere. Will was a mess and went to the bathroom to put some water on his face, trying to temper the blush, but it was still really present.  
  
When he finally came to the dining-room, everyone had started eating. Will's eyes went in search of his crush and widened when he saw that Tyler, of all people, was seated with him, along with the man he had been hitting on the previous night. There was also one girl, so the table was full. Will went to the kitchen to take his plate and walked around the other tables. At one point, Jackson looked up and grinned at him.  
  
Will took a deep breath and, as casually as he could, grabbed a nearby chair to slide it next to Tyler and added himself to their table. Tyler turned and smiled too, then said "Hey guys, this is Will. He's new..." Will was well aware of the reason why Tyler was stressing the last word and felt his face heat up. Tyler's new friend gave him a weird look, then turned to Tyler and whispered something in his ear. Tyler roared with laughter but didn't explain. Will spent the rest of his meal head bent over his plate. When he looked up, Jackson was getting up, his plate in his hand. He put the other one on Will's shoulder and said gently "Have a good afternoon, then, Will." It took Will five minutes to breathe normally again.  
  
He also made a spot on his tee-shirt with the chocolate pudding, so he went to the room to change. When he went out again, he heard cars leaving. Many people had left the dining-room and as he looked around, he got no sighting of the mind-melting smiler. He saw Tonya, who asked "Hey, Will, you didn't feel like going out with them, too?" "Going where?" She looked embarrassed "Nobody asked you? Oh, sorry, Will, there's a lake a few miles north and it's quite sunny today so those who wanted to go there carpooled." Will felt disappointed and relieved at the same time, he didn't really know why. "You didn't go yourself?" "No, my allergies are acting up. I said I'd finish cleaning and then I'll go listen some music in my room."  
  
Will did the same. He lay on his bed, trying not to think about a certain smile but it was too hard. He fished in his backpack and found his notebook. He started writing  
  
'Hey Sonny, I'm not at the coffee-house while writing this but at a weekend outing. You've been so supportive and kind in your last letter, it has given me the confidence to join the LGBT club there and it's great, it really is. Everyone is very respectful, no pressure like I've experienced once. Although I'm still wound up, but that's all my fault. I met someone. A man here, who is stunning and charming and sounds super nice. He has silky brown hair and beautiful brown eyes. I don't know if he's single and I barely manage to talk to him. Looks like guys upset me more than women... another sign I guess!  
  
I wish you could answer me before the weekend is over, help me get my act together. Maybe feed me lines (you know, better than "Hey Jackson, what's up?". Haven't used it, just an example...) You sound so confident I'm sure you know how things are done. As for me, I don't just lack sophistication, I'm also cautious. I'm not experienced. At all. I mean, even with girls... God, this is hard to write, you're the only person I can tell...'  
  
He put the unfinished letter under the pillow and lay on the mattress. As Sonny wouldn't answer until after the trip, he would have to find a way. It felt so frustrating. He had come to the weekend looking for friends and a community, not for meeting someone important. And yet, he didn't want to give up. The attraction he felt was off the chart.  
  
He went to the bathroom, took a long shower and spent a long time arranging his haircut. He took a long breath and walked to the building entrance. Everyone was back and when Tonya spotted him, she took him under her wing. Then Joel went and talked to him, inviting him to eat with him and his boyfriend, who wasn't Jackson. Will felt much, much better, even though the man of his thoughts was seated elsewhere. He had gotten a few new stares and smiles, so all in all, Will felt ready.  
  
He started the fire in the common room but kept his jacket on. He looked pointedly in the man's direction, made eye contact, and then looked to the sliding doors. Jackson took the hint and followed him out. Will's heart was playing an interesting variation of "Oh God, oh God, oh God..." when he saw the figure approaching him in the dark. There were no lights, only the stars and the moon, casting a grey, almost unreal glow, just enough for him to see the outline of the other man's body. It was easier this way, no smile to distract him, no eyes to drown into.  
  
But it was still the first time he was going to flirt with a man and he was filled with doubts. Should he talk first? He was busy freaking out when he heard the soft voice say "You were missed at the lake. You didn't want to come?"Will sighed. He didn't want to sound like a dork, so he took a dismissive tone "Nah, not really. It's kind of too cold to go swimming, don't you think?" "Yes, it is, but there are nice rocks to climb. I had taken my equipment... Oh yes, you don't like climbing."  
  
He made a pause, turning his head away, then added "Well, do you like the outing otherwise?" Will recalled the words about climbing and tried to make sense of how Jackson would already know that about him. He had barely said two words in his presence, so maybe Tyler told him. "Yes, lots of nice people around. I don't know many gay people yet, I thought it would be great to make new friends." "Like Tyler?" "Well, I met him before, at the Center. He's the one who told me about the weekend." "Oh, so you guys have gotten close, then?" Will frowned in the dark. Did the guy sound jealous or was he just making conversation? "Not really. I mean the guy is fun, but a little too much, I think. He asked me out but I said no." "Oh, OK, you're not looking for romance yet. I get that. You came out recently, didn't you? That's what Tyler was hinting at?" "Yeah. I'm not against the idea of dating though, just... I mean... Not with anyone..." Jackson laughed and replied "You mean someone who's something more than just attractive?" Will grinned. Jackson grinned too, as he brushed his hand through his dark hair. Will shivered and then continued looking bravely into those brown eyes. "I really do want to date. I think I know what I have been looking for, now, but I should probably go slow."  
  
"I get that. That's very wise. Especially at your age... I mean, I don't want to sound like an old bore! You're just very mature about it." Will would never have called himself mature, not with the fantasy zooming in his brain just hearing Jackson's breath next to him. But if that's what made the guy respect him more, he better be up to the task. "Well, I guess I'm seeing dating as something where two people have things in common to talk about, you know. Not that I mind the rest, but..." Will was grateful the man couldn't see the blush, he felt hotter than if he had been seated next to the fireplace. He got up and asked shyly "You want to walk a little? It's not very cold and I like it when I can see the stars like that, without the city lights." Jackson followed him "Yes, I would like to walk with you. Very much. I like that a lot. I was camping in the desert once, and I would see the stars perfectly, I swear I could have touched them. I felt like the little Prince in the children book." Will smiled "I know that story, my grandmother read it to me. She said it contained deep philosophical thoughts even though it was for kids. There was a man who was a drunk on one of the planets... We discussed that a lot." He stopped. This was no flirting material. He turned the conversation subject to the other man "What's your favorite part?" "Oh, all of it really. The fact that he travels, with the birds, that's something I really wanted to do. See the world." And did you?" "Yes, I saw some of it. But it's damn huge. I can't wait to discover more, but I can't spend all my time traveling, I have to think of my future too. What about you? You're a student right? Got big plans?" "Well, I'm good with computers, I thought I could work in the family business maybe." "Are they situated in Salem?" "Yes." "So you plan on staying around then." "I guess." "That's good." Will wished he had a conversation decoder, it would save him the headache he was getting trying to read under the lines.  
  
"I'm pretty busy at the moment, it's the first weekend I really am taking a rest actually, but me and my friends like to go to the movies sometimes. You could join us if you want." Will liked the idea. Maybe the guy really was just friendly, but that way he would get to know him better. "Sure. I think there's a Hitchcock festival next week. You go to concerts too?" "It depends. I tend to listen to the radio mostly but concerts can be fun." They had walked back to the building. Just before passing the door again, Will whispered "Well, see you tomorrow then. I liked talking with you." "Same here. I hope we can talk again tomorrow. Have a good-night." Of course Jackson left him with the picture of his smile engraved in his brain.  
  
Will went to his dorm. It was empty. He took his pajamas from under the pillow and found the letter he had written earlier. He climbed down the bunk bed, took his pen from his bag, and completed it:  
  
'It's Saturday night now and I've just gathered my courage and you know what? The guy is as nice as he seemed. I'm not sure he wants to be more than friends, maybe, maybe not, but I'm still quite proud of myself.  
  
I hope you can meet someone special too, we could double date... OK I'm getting ahead of myself, but a guy can dream, right? I really think we should meet in person one of these days in any case, I'm sure we'd hit it off.'  
  
He was about to sign when he heard footsteps. He was sitting on the bottom bed and his bag was on the other side of the room. His umbrella was still beside the door, so he slipped the note inside it and got up. The door opened and Jackson walked in.


	9. Chapter 9

**Sonny's POV**    
  
Sonny and Chad now had the lease to the building and they had hired a contractor to execute the design for their new coffee-house. The achievement of the milestones had invigorated him and Chad was starting to suspect something with the continued display of giddiness. Sonny decided it was best to say goodbye and pack for his weekend trip. He was still surprised that he had agreed to go as he had so many other things he should be doing. Joel was persuasive. He remembered that from the brief time they had dated and Joel was the only one he had allowed to call him Jackson. Joel was right though. He needed time to relax and meet people that weren't related to the coffee-house endeavor. Brian had not worked out after all, so he needed some friends at least. He had allowed himself to be totally consumed with business, except for the letters, of course. Those letters were pure pleasure and he looked forward to each reply more than he would ever admit.  
  
He finished packing and still had some time before his weekend trip so he decided to go to the library. When he was in school, this had always helped to calm him. He was deep into his book when he felt the need to stretch. He did and he saw a darling blond that drew his attention. He was tempted to linger, but he needed to go, so he did.  
  
Everyone else was meeting at the center but he was driving by himself. After all, he was one of the few alums who were attending and he knew the way there. Sonny was very appreciative of the introspective time offered by the drive and the scenery. He had been constantly busy and surrounded by people. The drive wasn't quite the same but it reminded him a little of his long solitary hikes. Sonny was honest, especially with himself, so during the drive he confessed to himself that part of the reason he couldn't make it work with Brian was because he was enthralled by the mysterious Will from the letters. His interest grew deeper with each letter and when Will came out to Sonny in the letters, Sonny was overwhelmed with pride and a general warmth. He had helped Will. If he could connect with him like that in letters, what would it be like if they ever met in person ?  
  
So . . .  
  
For the second half of the drive, Sonny indulged in a little daydream about his first meeting with Will. He remembered the barista had described him as dreamy with golden hair and pure blue eyes.  
  
Beep . . . beep . . .  
  
It would be a text, so Sonny pulled over. He would have ignored it, but he had offered to pick up any last minutes supplies when he emailed Joel back. He wanted to make up for not taking any riders with him.  
  
He scowled at the message.  
  
 **Brian** : Hey, Sonny. If you aren't too busy with the coffee shop, I thought we could hang out Saturday night.  
  
 **Sonny** : Thanks, Brian, but that isn't a great idea  
  
 **Brian** : Just as friends, no pressure, I promise  
  
 **Sonny** : Well actually I am away for the weekend  
  
 **Brian** : Oh OK, call me when you get back  
  
 **Sonny** : I might need some time, but i will call you in a few weeks - Have a good weekend - go out and have fun :)  
  
Sonny had been clear and kind, but Brian was overly confident. He put Brian out of his mind and decided to call Joel as he was about to pass the last town. Joel asked him to buy some bags of ice for the coolers.  
  
About 20 minutes later, Sonny had arrived. He parked the car in the long driveway and saw Joel coming out of the house followed by the adorable blond he had noticed in the library. He chuckled to himself at the returned opportunity he thought he had lost. There was something in the man's look that reminded him of the innocent and unassuming nature of his Will from the letters. He deliberately pulled his eyes back to his friend Joel smiling broadly.  
  
After giving Joel a friendly hug, Sonny grabbed his bag and went in search of a room for the night. They had stayed here before and Sonny knew the rooms. He immediately walked to his favorite room on the second floor hoping it was open. It offered the best view of the lake. There was a duffle bag on the top bunk, but the bottom bunk looked available so he quickly claimed it by depositing his bag. As he turned to leave he stopped dead in his tracks. There was an umbrella by the door, and not just any umbrella, an old one, a familiar one. He remembered the last time he saw that same umbrella weeks ago in the coffee shop. That was when he wrote the letter that started it all. Sonny was quite certain. His penpal Will would be sharing the room.  
  
Trying to hide his sudden nervous excitement, Sonny descended the stairs. He was going to meet Will. His Will.  
  
"Okay!" Joel said in his loud baritone voice. "Now that Jackson is here, everyone that had signed in has arrived. If someone feels like starting the fire, there's a woodshed next to the trash cans..."  
  
Sonny stood at the last step as he watched the adorable blond immediately head for the firewood. He knew it, that must be him. His Will would want to be as helpful as possible and out of the spotlight of the group. Maybe he was wrong, but Sonny did know more than half of the people here already, so there weren't that many possibilities left. Or maybe it was just wishful thinking as he was so attracted. Sonny positioned himself where he could see the door so that he could watch him come back with the logs and he did come back within 5 minutes or so. Sonny was staring intently at the door and then at the man as he came through the threshold carrying the logs. Sonny really did try to ignore the arm muscles flexing around the weight of the logs. He really did try. He looked right at the man and smiled. Sonny watched him enrapt as he worked to start the fire. It took a few tries but he was diligent. He could no longer resist coming closer to him..  
  
"You need help?" Sonny asked with a raspier voice then he intended.  
  
Mr. Adorable shook his head adamantly. "No, thanks, it's okay, it's... it's burning now..." Somehow the little fire brought a rosiness to his cheeks, but then before Sonny could stop him, he walked, almost ran to the dining room. Sonny followed, but found him already seated next to Tyler, so Sonny sat by Joel as they needed to catch up.  
  
After dinner, Sonny went right to a bench by the fireplace. He wanted to enjoy the fire his Will had created. He imagined the warmth he felt being sent from Will to himself as he chatted with the people around him. Sonny watched Will as he walked back and forth in the room every now and then looking in Sonny's direction. He also noticed Tyler had a new prey which was good as he didn't like the thought of Tyler with Will. A seat opened up on the bench next to him and he watched intently as Will walked toward him, but then he turned suddenly and went upstairs. Damn! Sonny had sensed Will's nervousness and apparently it was too much for him. Of course it was, Will had just realized he was gay days ago. He probably felt like a lamb in the lion's den. As Sonny had sat on the bench by the fire, he noticed several eyes following Will in his slow pacing. In fact, Sonny had been ready to pounce if someone else had made a move.  
  
He was afraid that if he followed him up now it would be overwhelming. Will obviously chose to be alone. Further, Sonny wasn't sure what he would do alone in a bedroom with him, so he waited, he chatted and was generally social.  
  
The room was thinning out and Sonny's heart was racing. Soon he would be sharing a bedroom with beautiful Will. Sonny got a beer from the fridge to relax. He finished it quickly and then tip-toed into the room. He could hear Will breathing evenly, definitely sleeping. He quickly got ready for bed in the dark and then took a quick peek at the upper bunk with the moonlight shining through. He couldn't quite see, but he hesitated to climb the ladder. He managed a glimpse of the golden hair and then he knew what he had already assumed. It was Will. The man, the umbrella, the personality shining through the letters. It all fit. This was his Will. The Will. The one he had started to dream about. He climbed into the covers, pulling them tight with his subconscious wishing they were Will. His conscious self knew better. If he wanted Will, really wanted Will, he would need to be patient. He would need to give him time and support him as a friend at first.  
  
That was all well and good, but subconscious-Sonny was fighting toward the surface and subconscious-Sonny wanted to rip the slats under Will's mattress in half so that the mattress and Will would fall to the lower bunk into Sonny's waiting arms.  
  
Sonny shook himself back to reality, saying in his mind: it is time to sleep and show some respect. And he did sleep, eventually. And he did dream.  
  
Sonny woke early and immediately started his day, getting ready quickly and joining the group for breakfast. Sonny sat where he would be able to see Will when he descended the stairs. When he saw Will walk in, he smiled and rose to greet him, anxiety and hope were equally mixed in his veins.  
  
"Hey, Will, right? Joel told me you were new. This seat taken?" He was certainly looking good this morning. The extra few hours of sleep were to his credit. Then the look changed. Will looked completely frightened as he mumbled:  
  
"Yeah... no... I mean, I have to go..." Sonny heard the words and watched him retreat to his bedroom with a frenzied pace. Sonny knew better. Will was delicate and new to everything. He had let the torment he felt last night drive him to move too fast. Sonny didn't know what to do, but he knew he couldn't go back to the room. If he did, Will would probably jump out of the window, so he stayed with the group...  
  
Eventually, Will returned to the large kitchen. Sonny had lost all confidence after Will had run away from him. Ever since Will had returned, things had gone from bad to worse. The group was preparing lunch, which should have been great team-bonding, except for the fact that all of Sonny's senses were laser-focused on one member of the group. He had almost cut himself three times now while chopping vegetables for the salad. His eyes continued to wander up from the knife to the blond angel floating around the kitchen. OK, so maybe that was an exaggeration, but it didn't feel like one to Sonny at the time. Somehow, Sonny managed to chop the last onion with tears welling in his eyes. He looked around with blurred vision, but he couldn't find him anywhere. He tossed the salad and looking up every few seconds. He never came back to the kitchen so as everyone went to be seated, Sonny followed a bit disappointed. Tyler waved him over to a table.  
  
Finally, Will was back, again, entering the dining room looking refreshed and somehow agitated at the same time. Sonny felt a sliver of peace enter his core with Will's entrance. He monitored Will off and on while he ate and when their eyes finally met he gave what he hoped was a heartfelt smile. He missed whatever it was that Tyler and Tonya were laughing about, but he chuckled along to blend in as he watched Will take a chair at a nearby table and pull it up next to Tyler.  
  
It made no sense, but Sonny recognized the emotion welling in his chest. It was jealousy. He had no right to feel this. He had gathered from the letters that Tyler was interested in Will, and worse, Will had admired Tyler's build. So . . . Tyler's introduction was less than welcome.  
  
"Hey guys, this is Will. He's new..."  
  
Sonny pondered what the emphasis on the last word was intended to accomplish. Tyler's new conquest seemed to understand as he gave Tyler a pointed look and then whispered in his ear. Tyler laughed, but Sonny didn't care. His eyes were drawn to Will who looked flush and self-conscious now. The elegance Will had brought into the lunchroom was now overshadowed by his insecurity and Sonny wanted to help. He had never meant anyone as sensitive as Will and it was both intriguing and endearing. After watching Will focus on his food, he got up and walked over to him. With his plate in one hand, he placed the other on Will's shoulder reveling in the energy that passed between them in that simple touch. He spoke softly, "Have a good afternoon, then, Will."  
  
Sonny joined the lake excursion. He took his climbing gear from his trunk. Hopefully, Will would show up at the lake and if he didn't, at least Sonny could climb. Alone in any case...


	10. Chapter 10

**Will's POV**    
  
Will's heart was beating so fast that his whole skull was echoing it. His eyes had found Jackson's and had stayed fixed, until he found his breath back and managed to ask "You... Were you looking for me? You had a question?" A part of him hoped that the man was going to ask him out, in a straightforward way. Another upset part was panicking. Was he ready for this? He wasn't sure Jackson had heard him. His eyes had left Will's were fixated on his lips. Then they went further down and Will shivered. For two reasons. One, the gaze was doing things to him. Two, he had been in the middle of undressing when he had found his unfinished note and his chest was bare...  
  
Now, Will was in full-blown panic, and he was ready to say no if dating was offered. Not because he wasn't interested anymore but because he just couldn't, it would be too fast.  
  
Jackson's head snapped and he looked up again, talking in a tensed voice "Actually, no... It seems we share this room." Will felt his thinking-process go back to a semblance of normality, allowing him to assess what was happening. It was embarrassing. It was surprising too and he said, prudently "I had no idea. Looks like we missed each other last night. You had no clue either?" Jackson shook his head, lips pursed. He replied "I suspected it... But I wasn't sure. You were already asleep and I didn't turn the lights on.""Oh, okay... Well, do you want to use the bathroom first?" "No, no, go ahead. I mean, you were getting ready for bed obviously and..."  
  
Will was sure he was red from head to foot. He walked to the bathroom mirror to confirm it and heard Jackson mumble something indistinct, that sounded like "... be a little harder to sleep, now..." but he didn't dare ask him to repeat it louder.  
  
Instead he put on his pajama top and brushed his teeth, then splashed cold water on his face in an attempt to reduce the blushing. He wasn't satisfied with the result but he still exited the bathroom and almost ran into his roommate. His stomach recoiled on instinct and they passed each other without touching each other at all, limbs moving slowly and purposefully. To Will, the result was the same as a collision though, as he felt his muscles tense and his breathing stop again. Jackson was looking anywhere but at him and quickly closed the door. Will was in the middle of climbing the small ladder to the top bed when the door opened again and he saw Jackson grab his bag and retrieve his toiletry bag. Their eyes met again, briefly. Will couldn't seem to control his staring as it followed the other man to the bathroom door.  
  
He shook himself and resumed his climbing, then lay on the bed. Now was the time to relax himself to sleep and he had no idea how to do that anymore. The evening conversations were playing in his head as well as every expression the face of his crush when he had entered the room. There was the sound of a shower. For a moment, Will just focused on his bodily reactions. Those were so new, so rough. As upsetting as it was, it was still allowed, for the first time in his life and for that, it was awesome. He had been fighting the urge to jump the man and taste his lips but he wasn't denying the feeling like he always had in the past.  
  
There was something more, though, in the way they had talked. The man was sweet and friendly, connecting with him on other levels than just physical attraction and the fact that he hadn't reduced Will to someone to seduce was gratifying. He was looking forward discussing movies with him, or music or anything, really. And the idea of doing so while drowning himself into those big warm brown eyes was very, very appealing.  
  
The shower was really taking a long time and Will was nowhere ready to sleep. He thought about the note in the umbrella and decided to go fetch it. He was about to when Jackson entered the room again. "Oh, did you need... Were you...?" "No, I was just... I..." They stopped talking and Will climbed on his mattress, determined not to move again.  
  
He didn't sleep though. Each time he closed his eyes, he could see Jackson's face and coupled with the soft breathing he could hear beneath him, it made him feel like he was sleeping with him in the bed. It was unnerving. And exciting as hell. How come was experiencing such strong emotions about someone he just met? Maybe it was the coming-out process and it would calm down. Enough for him to feel comfortable around the man...  
  
When it was late enough to be called morning, they got up, performing another "dance", as they took turn in the bathroom, brushing against each other as they passed, using the sinks side by side to fix their hair, and Will wondered how many minutes of his life he had lost each time his heart had stopped beating. He decided to act casual, as well as he could and asked "So, you want to go get breakfast? I don't know who prepares the coffee but it's really good..." Jackson smiled and chuckled "Thanks, Will. I hope it is, I'm a coffee-house owner so I better be good at preparing it." "Oh? Where is it situated?" "Just near campus. Students make great customers, you see, they can't live without their caffeine fix!" For a second Will had wondered if Jackson was talking about his notes-exchange-coffee-house but it was across town. It would have given him another good reason to go there...  
  
They went to the kitchen and Will watched the other man prepare the coffee. Yawning people started arriving, Tyler with his arm around his new boyfriend, Tonya bickering with Joel about cleaning up after lunch and all the other weekend participants, until the kitchen was full. Will realized he hadn't make many new friends, what with his obsession with just one guy. On the other hand, now was a moment of relaxed interaction with Jackson and he didn't want to miss the opportunity. Jackson lifted his head from the coffee-machine and grinned at him. Will might have grinned back.  
  
"Coffee's ready." Although Jackson had been whispering, everybody heard him and soon Will found himself slowly pushed away by caffeine-deprived students. He stared gloomily at the cup he was holding and felt an arm wrapping around his shoulder. He turned, hope rising in his heart but it wasn't the face he was expecting to see. "So, Will, you're kind of cute... I was telling Tyler yesterday that he's lucky I met him first because... I mean... Wow!" Will felt his face go through layers after layers of embarrassed blushing. He looked around for help, but they were far from the others, so he gently but firmly disentangled himself and took a step back "Well, I'm glad for Tyler, actually. He may have told you, I'm not really in the dating mood myself." He had hoped the guy would take the hint but he didn't look very bright and kept smiling in a predatory way "I'm not really either, just having fun this weekend, you know... Can I have your number for when you do feel like dating?"  
  
Will felt he had turned more people down in the past weeks than during the rest of his life. And yet, he still didn't really know how to. The more he mumbled, the more the guy insisted and he was about to cave and give the number, so as to be finally left alone, when somebody came behind them. "Hey Will, have I told you me and Tyler dated once? Just for fun but damn, that guy can be possessive. Another guy in a bar smiled at me and... well, you should have seen what happened..." Jackson was wearing a shit-eating grin and winking at Will but Tyler's unfortunate fling couldn't see him and paled. "Oh, hum... You know what Will, let's forget all that. Have a good week-end, I'll go and find Tyler."  
  
Will waited for him to be far enough to really chuckle and thanked Jackson with a big smile. Joel heard them and came inquiring, along with his own boyfriend and soon Will was introduced to the other participants he didn't know.  
  
He had to focus on new names and do small talks, so he didn't have an opportunity to talk further with the man of his dreams. Yet, he appreciated making new friends and especially the part when about four or five guys told him about their coming-out to help him with his anxiety about it. Jackson shared his hilarious misunderstanding when his parents thought he was telling them he was becoming a Buddhist monk because he was using tons of metaphors and indirect approaches. His mother was so relieved she hugged him tight and said "At least, now you may give me some grandchildren, even though in a non-conventional way." and his father was still bringing that story up EVERY time they were in a family gathering. Will started to relax slightly, although he wasn't convinced his own parents would be as cool as those he had heard about. His father's words were still fresh in his mind but one glance at the man seated on his right and he knew he wouldn't go back in the closet. He might not be ready for physical intimacy with a man yet, he still very much wanted to date the guy.  
  
After lunch, everyone helped with the cleaning and soon Joel called Will to tell him "I know you came in my car on Friday, but Jackson lives much nearer to college than I am. I thought he could drop you off, you wouldn't mind?" Will assured him solemnly it wasn't a problem and went to take his duffle bag, feeling as a teenage girl before her first date.  
  
Once in the car, he grinned at his ride and spent the first half of the way back gazing at him, until they neared Salem and Jackson started asking him how he liked the LGBT community and offering his help and support for when he chose to come out at his parents. Will was starting to realize he must have read the signal wrong and Jackson was just the friendliest person ever. He hid his bitter disappointment behind a brave grin and chit-chatted while enjoying the proximity of the man's body in the next seat.  
  
As Will's grandmother lived just next to campus, they drove to her building. As Will was exiting the car, he heard "Wait, I'll need your cellphone! You know, for the movie nights we talked about?" Will frowned, then he remembered Jackson was talking about a group outing. He took his notebook out and scribbled his number on it. "Thanks, see you soon I hope!" And with that he was gone. Will stayed on the sidewalk, melancholic, looking down at his notebook. He had started a letter to Sonny but it wasn't in it anymore, it was still in his umbrella. He went inside and retrieve the note to write about all these feelings so new to him. But on the paper there was written " _To Will_."


	11. Chapter 11

**Sonny's POV**    
  
Will never made an appearance at the lake. Sonny had waited for more than a half an hour before he separated from the group, feeling rejected and ready to take it out on the small mountain.  
  
They arrived back after the excursion and much to Sonny's dismay, Will was not in the common room. Where could he have gone if he wasn't here? Sonny wondered. Dinner was already heating, so the group began eating in the next 20 minutes. Sonny found a table with some old friends where he would easily be able to see Will if he came into the room, which he did of course. Sonny watched as Mr. Adorable was led away by Joel and escorted to a table. Fortunately, he was in view, so Sonny watched him boldly and a few times, their eyes met and he smiled. He wanted to be obvious. If he lacked confidence, Sonny would supply it. Sonny got distracted for only a moment by the table conversation and suddenly he was gone. Sonny comically twisted his head in all directions with no confirmed sighting. He gave up taking his dishes to the kitchen. When he returned he was rewarded with the sight of Will once again lighting the fire. Once it was lit, he looked directly into Sonny's eyes and there was a purpose there, a determination. Then he looked deliberately at the sliding glass doors, before opening them and exiting the cabin. Of course, Sonny followed, his heartbeat increasing with each step as he approached the gorgeous man alone at the edge of the forest dimly lit by the moonlight.  
  
Sonny spoke as he came nearer. He said the first thing that came to mind. It was in his mind all day. "You were missed at the lake. You didn't want to come?"  
  
"Nah, not really. It's kind of too cold to go swimming, don't you think?" Will sounded nonchalant and it unnerved Sonny.  
  
"Yes, it is, but there are nice rocks to climb. I had taken my equipment... Oh yes, you don't like climbing." Oh my god! That was a mistake. Will said that in a letter. Sonny tried very hard to remain calm, hoping that Will wouldn't pick up on it.  
  
After a moment, "Well, do you like the outing otherwise?" Sonny asked, desperately trying to distract and recover.  
  
"Yes, lots of nice people around. I don't know many gay people yet, I thought it would be great to make new friends." Sonny pictured Tyler kissing Will. He knew he shouldn't, but he did.  
  
"Like Tyler?"  
  
"Well, I met him before, at the Center. He's the one who told me about the weekend."  
  
"Oh, so you guys have gotten close, then?" Sonny was jealous, he couldn't help himself.  
  
"Not really. I mean the guy is fun, but a little too much, I think. He asked me out but I said no."  
  
He said 'no'. Great!  
  
"Oh, OK, you're not looking for romance yet. I get that. You came out recently, didn't you? That's what Tyler was hinting at?" Sonny was trying to assess his chances without startling Will too much.  
  
"Yeah. I'm not against the idea of dating though, just... I mean... Not with anyone..."  
  
Sonny latched onto the words like a fish to a worm. Was he saying he wanted Sonny and not Tyler? He was making it clear that he wanted to date, but chose with whom. He was probably being too wishful in his logic.  
  
Will grinned. Sonny grinned too and brushed his hand with his hair. He felt the need to explain his satisfied expression.  
  
"I get that. That's very wise. Especially at your age... I mean, I don't want to sound like an old bore! You're just very mature about it."  
  
"Well, I guess I'm seeing dating as something where two people have things in common to talk about, you know. Not that I mind the rest, but..."  
  
 _Do we have things in common?_ Sonny speculated. _Can I make sure we have something to talk about? And what about the rest? Will doesn't mind the rest, but I think I love the rest._ Sonny was contemplating as Will stood up and asked "You want to walk a little? It's not very cold and I like it when I can see the stars like that, without the city lights."  
  
Sonny bolted up beside Will answering him, "Yes, I would like to walk with you. Very much. I like that too. I was camping in the desert once, and I would see them perfectly, I swear I could have touched them. I felt like the little Prince in the children's book." Sonny was trying to read Will's eyes, but it was difficult in the dark. He did see a smile though.  
  
"I know that story, my grandmother read it to me. She said it contained deep philosophical thoughts even though it was for kids. There was a man who was a drunk on one of the planets... We discussed that a lot."  
  
 _Hmmm . . . that is an interesting part to spend lots of time on._  
  
Will continued, "What's your favorite part?"  
  
"Oh, all of it really. The fact that he travels, with the birds, that's something I really wanted to do. See the world."  
  
"And did you?"  
  
"Yes, I saw some of it. But it's damn huge. I can't wait to discover more, but I can't spend all my time traveling, I have to think of my future too. What about you? You're a student right? Got big plans?" Sonny wanted to learn more about Will. He wanted to leave the weekend with a good list of things they could talk about.  
  
"Well, I'm good with computers, I thought I could work in the family business maybe."  
  
 _Of course, he is smart and beautiful. Please be in Salem!_  
  
"Are they situated in Salem?"  
  
"Yes."  
  
"So you plan on staying around then."  
  
"I guess."  
  
"That's good." Sonny was looking at Will and wasn't sure their being in the same city meant as much too Will. Well, that was OK. Sonny was willing to work for what he wanted. "I'm pretty busy at the moment, it's the first weekend I really am taking a rest actually, but me and my friends like to go to the movies sometimes. You could join us if you want."  
  
"Sure. I think there's a Hitchcock festival next week. You go to concerts too?"  
  
 _This seems like progress_ . . . "It depends. I tend to listen to the radio mostly but concerts can be fun."  
  
They had walked back to the building. Just before passing the door again, Will whispered "Well, see you tomorrow then. I liked talking with you."  
  
"Same here. I hope we can talk again tomorrow. Have a good-night." Sonny gave him his best smile hoping to give Will enough confidence to propel him to connect again. Then Sonny laughed to himself, because of course Will thought they were saying goodnight and wouldn't see each other until tomorrow, but Sonny knew better. He knew that he would rejoin Will in their shared room very soon, and he was excited. He couldn't wait to be close to him again. Sharing a room for the night, even though they wouldn't touch, still had some of the intimacy that Sonny craved with a desperation.  
  
Sonny wanted to give Will some time before he "pounced", so he grabbed a beer and went to chat with a nearby group in the common room. He knew a few of them, but he was completely on edge. His mind was filled with images of Will changing into his pajamas. Of course, for now, they were completely fabricated, but he hoped someday he would witness that, and he was glad he gave Will the privacy for the time being. After about 20 minutes, Sonny couldn't resist the pull any longer, and he found himself climbing the stairs to their shared room. He paused in front of the door before walking in.  
  
Sonny's heart arrested when he was met with the sight of Will in his pajama pants, _sans_ shirt.  
  
Oh god! He is like the living David by Michelangelo but not in marble and much shorter, of course, and warm . . . soft.  
  
Sonny had seen the David in person and it was great, but Will? Will was overwhelming. Sonny tried to breathe deeply, but it was only shallow. It did manage to deliver oxygen to his brain, so that was good.  
  
"You... Were you looking for me? You had a question?"  
  
God, yes! Kiss me please? Hold me please?  
  
. . . But Sonny didn't say any of these things. However, he did notice he was staring at Will's lips, so he let his eyes drop which was worse as he was now staring at that gorgeous torso.  
  
 _Oh god! Not being a gentleman_.  
  
Sonny abruptly lifted his head up to focus on Will's eyes. It was time to be honest.  
  
"Actually, no... It seems we share this room." Sonny explained while the guilt invaded.  
  
"I had no idea. Looks like we missed each other last night. You had no clue either?"  
  
 _Oh god!_ He just couldn't lie to Mr. Adorable.  
  
So, he shook his head, pursed his lips and replied,"I suspected it... But I wasn't sure. You were already asleep and I didn't turn the lights on."  
  
Will was the gracious diplomat.  
  
"Oh, okay... Well, do you want to use the bathroom first?"  
  
"No, no, go ahead. I mean, you were getting ready for bed obviously and . . ."  
  
Sonny watched as the rosiness crept into Will's cheeks before he turned to the bathroom. That literally did him in.  
  
"Well it is going to be a little harder to sleep, now..." He mumbled.  
  
Sonny stared at the bathroom door like the absolute freaky stalker that he was. He was still staring when Will opened the door. He immediately dropped his eyes to the floor and then the window. He didn't want to freak Will out with his staring. Sonny quickly grabbed his toiletry bag and then their eyes met and he melted. He directed his melting into the bathroom door where he would be safe and alone. He took a shower and he thought of Will and he took care of himself. He knew it would be a long time before Will was ready for intimacy. Sonny walked out to their shared room with pleasurable anxiety pulsing through him.  
  
"Oh, did you need... Were you...?"  
  
"No, I was just... I..."  
  
Sonny really wanted to know what he would say. Sonny would give Will anything. Yes, even now he would.  
  
Sonny tried to sleep, but his mind was dominated with images of Will. Will with him, as in, actually together. Finally, it was morning, and they both were awake. This morning, they shared the bathroom, and there were moments when they were close, very close. To Sonny's surprise, Will made the next move.  
  
"So, you want to go get breakfast? I don't know who prepares the coffee but it's really good . . ."  
  
Sonny smiled and laughed softly, "Thanks, Will. I hope it is, I'm a coffee-house owner so I better be good at preparing it."  
  
"Oh? Where is it situated?"  
  
"Just near campus. Students make great customers, you see, they can't live without their caffeine fix!" Sonny was hoping to lure Will in when they opened.  
  
They went to the kitchen and Sonny prepared the coffee feeling 'watched' in the best way. Others started arriving and Sonny could feel the change as the intimacy they had shared over the last 9 hours was now gone, but Will was still by his side and that was enough. Sonny looked up to feel the reassurance that Will's presence brought. He smiled at Will and Will smiled back which was promising. Will seemed almost comfortable now, but Sonny knew he would still need to take it slow.  
  
Sonny was satisfied for two reasons when he stated, "Coffee's ready."  
  
He started pouring for everyone and wondered why Will wasn't one of the first to be served. He looked for him and stopped mid-pour and the sight before him. Tyler's new boyfriend had his arm around Will and he was whispering to him with his face much too close. Sonny felt that Kiriakis-temper he always tried to contain, flaming inside of him. He couldn't hear the words, but it was obvious that this was flirting, blatant and bold flirting. Sonny could see that Will was affected, and not in a good way. He was blushing furiously and he looked stiff and uncomfortable as his eyes darted around the kitchen. Finally, Will managed to slip out of the other man's arm as he spoke firmly to his pursuer. Said pursuer, didn't seem to take the hint. He looked just as hungry and optimistic as before. Sonny watched the continued pursuit and he saw Will's resolve buckling, so he had to help.  
  
He snuck up behind Will, "Hey, Will, have I told you me and Tyler dated once? Just for fun but damn, that guy can be possessive. Another guy in a bar smiled at me and... well, you should have seen what happened..." Sonny winked at Will to bring him into the game.  
  
Tyler's conquest was affected by this and he responded, "Oh, hum... You know what Will, let's forget all that. Have a good week-end, I'll go and find Tyler."  
  
They both watched him retreat and then Will turned to Sonny giving him the most beautiful smile along with a chuckle. Joel joined them and introduced his boyfriend.  
  
That took him away from Sonny, but he was glad to see Will comfortable again and meeting new people. He watched from the sidelines as his sweet and shy Will connected with the members of the group. He admired Will as he sincerely interacted with the others. Sonny could feel the growing seed of happiness that Will's presence had planted in him. He took a moment to go upstairs. He had gotten ready so quickly with Will beside him he wanted to check his hair and maybe pack a few of his things.  
  
He hurriedly entered the room and bumped the umbrella that was sitting by the door. He picked up gently, after all, this was the thing that brought Will into his life. He set it back in place by the door and his eyes lingered on it. Then he noticed a piece of paper laying beside it with the word "Sonny". He only hesitated for a second before picking it up to read. It was addressed to him, after all...  
  
'Hey Sonny, I'm not at the coffee-house while writing this but at a weekend outing. You've been so supportive and kind in your last letter, it has given me the confidence to join the LGBT club there and it's great, it really is. Everyone is very respectful, no pressure like I've experienced once. Although I'm still wound up, but that's all my fault. I met someone. A man here, who is stunning and charming and sounds super nice. He has silky brown hair and beautiful brown eyes. I don't know if he's single and I barely manage to talk to him. Looks like guys upset me more than women... another sign I guess!"  
  
Sonny's heart dropped in his chest as he scanned through images in his mind of everyone here. Who had silky brown hair? Without settling on his rival, he went back to the letter to read more.  
  
"I wish you could answer me before the weekend is over, help me get my act together. Maybe feed me lines (you know, better than "Hey Jackson, what's up?". Haven't used it, just an example...)"  
  
A tidal wave of emotion washed over Sonny has he read this line over and over. It was him. Sonny was the one with the silky brown hair and the brown eyes. Will had called him stunning. Wow! ... and charming. He also realized that Will hadn't heard anyone call him Sonny yet. Tyler hadn't said his name. Joel was the only one Will had heard address him. If he heard the name he would probably wonder, but he might not automatically connect it. He went back to finish reading the letter.  
  
"You sound so confident I'm sure you know how things are done. As for me, I don't just lack sophistication, I'm also cautious. I'm not experienced. At all. I mean, even with girls... God, this is hard to write, you're the only person I can tell…  
  
It's Saturday night now and I've just gathered my courage and you know what? The guy is as nice as he seemed. I'm not sure he wants to be more than friends, maybe, maybe not, but I'm still quite proud of myself.  
  
I hope you can meet someone special too, we could double date... OK I'm getting ahead of myself, but a guy can dream, right? I really think we should meet in person one of these days in any case, I'm sure we'd hit it off."  
  
Sonny laughed internally at the double date. If he had gotten this letter without meeting Will, without it being about him, he would have been jealous. He still would have wanted to meet though, but it was about him. Will had chosen him out of all the others. There were others. He could have picked Tyler or Tyler's new boyfriend or any of the others that had looked at Will with interest over the weekend, but Will chose Sonny. That knowledge gave him hope. This hope would also give him the patience to let Will set the pace. He could wait, but first, he would reply. He wanted Will to hear from him in the letter that Sonny was also Jackson. He also knew Will could be insecure, so he wanted it to be clear that Sonny had also chosen Will. He hoped that would bolster Will's confidence. He sat on the bed, took out his notebook, and wrote his reply.  
  
Once he had the letter from Will in his backpack and the reply tucked in the umbrella, Sonny joined the group. They were talking about their coming out experiences. Sonny shared his misunderstanding when his parents thought he was telling them he was becoming a Buddhist monk, preferring to dwell on the funny side of it instead of the emotional reaction his mother had displayed. After his personal story, Will relaxed even more, which was Sonny's purpose.  
  
After lunch, everyone helped with the cleaning and Sonny asked Joel for a favor which he soon delivered on. Sonny listened as he spoke to Will.  
  
"I know you came in my car on Friday, but Jackson lives much nearer to college than I am. I thought he could drop you off, you wouldn't mind?"  
  
Sonny watched Will enrapt as he answered that it wasn't a problem.  
  
Once in the car, Sonny could feel the electricity. Will smiled at him and as they drove on Sonny noticed that he wasn't the only one that couldn't keep his eyes of the other.  
  
When they neared Salem and Sonny started asking him how he liked the LGBT community and offering his help and support for when he chose to come out at his parents. Sonny really wanted to help Will, if he could and he knew it would be a long time before Will was ready for what Sonny wanted now. So they talked about Will's next steps and Sonny really hoped he was helpful.  
  
He took Will to his grandmother's as requested. Will was leaving the car and Sonny panicked. He wasn't sure when Will would find his letter.  
  
"Wait, I'll need your cellphone! You know, for the movie nights we talked about?" He hoped he came of as casual but he was afraid that he sounded desperate instead. It didn't matter, Will gave him the number on a notepad paper and Sonny could take his time to move things forward. Right now, he just needed a way to connect.  
  
"Thanks, see you soon I hope!" Sonny smiled at that and drove away watching Will on the sidewalk in his rearview mirror.  
  
He would miss Will, but he was happy as he drove away knowing that Will would soon find his letter in the umbrella.


	12. Chapter 12

**Will's POV**  

Will looked at the umbrella, frowning. He was pretty sure he had put his unfinished letter in it, not one of Sonny's old notes. He must have been distracted... Yes, definitely, as the mere thought of standing half-naked in front of Jackson was making his head spin again. He was walking to his bag to find the correct paper when he heard the front door open.

 

“Will, I'm home, are you there?” “I'm here, grandma!” He joined her in the living-room. She looked tired from her trip but otherwise serene. “So, was the seminary interesting?” “Very. You would have gotten bored, I'm afraid! Lots of technical terms and clinical observations. But it's helpful.” “What was it about?” “Helping parents deal with their teenagers acting up. You know, drinking, doing drugs, unprotected sex... We all wish it wouldn't happen but there it is.” She sighed. Will decided to lighten up the mood “Oh, I would know, grandma. Remember when I did all of that... On the same day, even!” Marlena chuckled “Yes, you were a perfect teenager, you smartass! Never stepped out of line.” She paused and asked, prudently “You didn't have sex with Gabi, did you? I always wondered.” Will frowned “What do you mean?” “Well, Gabi was... is very beautiful. And we're not the kind of family to judge you if you don't wait until marriage. I mean... as long as you're more responsible than your parents, that's fine by me.” “I know, grandma. I wondered about that too, actually. I think I've got the answer but you may not like it.”

 

Marlena froze. Then she sat on the edge of the couch and raised her eyes. Will was relieved to recognize the look as the grandmotherly one, not the shrink one. He hadn't planned to come out like that, but he also knew that he would have to do it at some point. He didn't know how well Marlena would take the news but at least he was sure she would remain collected. None of his parents were good at taking things calmly.

 

“This weekend outing I went to...” “Yes?” “It was for the college LGBT center. It means...” “I know what LGBT stands for, Will... Did you make some friends here? Like that Tracy girl you went to a concert with?” Will was dumbfounded “How on earth did you pick on that? You've never met her.” “Oh, it was just a guess. I'm good at those, sometimes. I have another but I don't know if I should share it with you. Go on.” Will focused very hard on Sonny's words about coming out. And Jackson's too. Then he took a jump from the diving board of his mind and whispered “I think I'm gay too.”

 

He waited for a few seconds until he had gathered enough courage to look up. He was suddenly realizing he might get kicked out of the last place he considered home.

 

Marlena wasn't smiling. She was thoughtful. Then she spoke softly “If you are, then I'm glad you found this kind of group support from the get go. Add me to the people who will be there to listen to whatever you need to say about it.” Then the smile appeared, slowly, like a mist dissolving a few clouds. She stood up and hugged him, so tight, his breath was knocked out of him “My dear, dear boy! I feel honored you felt you could share something so intimate with me.” Then she turned and went to the kitchen “Would you like some tea?”

 

Now, Will really had to finish writing to Sonny. He searched frantically but the number of notes didn't make sense. He took the one he found in the umbrella to see which one it was. As he glanced over it, he realized he didn't recognize the wording, which was odd. He knew all of them almost by heart. If it wasn't for his dreaming about Jackson, he would say he was obsessed with Sonny...

 

So, he sat on his bed and started reading.

 

'Dear Will,

 

I was so happy to get your last note. I need to start this reply with a confession. You know me as Sonny, but you also know me as Jackson. My legal name is Jackson but my family and most of my friends call me Sonny. When we first met in person, Joel called me Jackson. He is one of the only people who uses my legal name. I want you to know that I never meant to deceive you. I sincerely didn’t know you would be on the outing and I didn’t know that the room was yours when I first chose it. That is my favorite room from past outings, but then I saw the umbrella and I knew.

I did think about telling you in person, but I was so happy for the opportunity to get to know you better. I didn’t want to add any pressure during our short time together. I hope you can understand. My only intentions are to support you and to know you better. Well, if I am being totally honest, and I want to be, there is one more. I am hoping in time we might date each other, and have a relationship. To be totally clear, I am very interested in you and very attracted to you. Sharing a room with you was some kind of delicious torture. It was great to be close to you and I want to be even closer. However, I want you to take all the time you need and I promise, that I will never pressure you. You are worth waiting for, and I am willing to wait for you.

I hope we can start our friendship soon, though. Maybe we can go to the Hitchcock festival? Just the two of us? I promise it can be friendly with no pressure.

I am glad you joined the LGBT club. It will be good for you. It is very supportive. Also, just so you know, I am not sure about stunning and charming, but I am definitely single. Also, “Hey Jackson, what’s up?” is a great line. I promise it would work on me. No amount of practice can beat sincerity.

It was so nice when you gathered the courage to talk to me one on one. I was so excited when you looked at me and then the doors, letting me know I should join you. Our walk under the stars was just perfect. I really enjoyed the time with you.

Also, being inexperienced is fine. Please don’t be insecure about that. Sometimes experience can be a bad thing and sometimes the first times can be great.

I did meet someone special too and I am so happy to have spent that time with you. I have to say ‘no’ to the double date, but I am hoping you say 'yes' to joining me for the Hitchcock festival.

You were right that we should meet in person. We definitely ‘hit it off’.

Our notes have been great, but I would like you to be able to reach me anytime, more immediately. Here is all my contact information. If you want to talk to me, please don’t hesitate. It will always be a pleasant surprise.

Phone: 555-555-5555

Email: SonnyK2@nmail.com

Facebook: Sonny Kiriakis

Twitter: @SonnyK2

Yours, Sonny'

 

Actually, Will couldn't read the last lines. They were out of focus. He felt so many emotions, he was on the edge of throwing up. He stood up and paced, trying to make sense of all he had just read. Jack _son_ was _Son_ ny. _The_ Sonny. And he was into _him_. He stopped and took the letter again, to check he had read it correctly.

 

He took out his cell and typed the number in. But he didn't call, nor text. His trembling fingers opened his laptop and he entered Sonny's e-mail in his box, but he didn't send any mail.

 

Then he opened Facebook and that's when things got real. If he was asking Sonny to befriend him, Sonny would see it. He closed his eyes and let the man's image appear on its own against his eyelids. With eyes full of compassion and softness. And carrying an energy that made Will's knees weak. He pressed the button blindly.

 

He read the letter again, as he waited for Sonny to maybe answer the request that night. It felt like honey was pouring into his veins, very fast. He had just reached a third of it when he heard a notification sound. He rushed to the screen. 'Sonny Kiriakis has accepted your friend's request'. And sure enough, in the 'About' section, he was marked as 'Single'.

 

Sonny's name appeared in his chat box, online, but he didn't feel up to start talking with him after such a revelation. Instead, he started reading the wall, avidly. There were picture of mountains' tops and lots of people wishing him a happy birthday in different languages. There was no mention of a coffee-house though. Will didn't get it and was disappointed too. He would have like to have the address or at least the name. Then he could show up there, maybe.

 

That's when he realizes that the other coffee-house, the one where it had all started, was out of the picture. They knew each other, now. Well, not that much. He continued reading, feeling like a creep, somehow. He wondered if Sonny was doing the same thing. Another notification. 'Sonny likes your link' gave him the answer. It wasn't an old post but it was from a few weeks ago. Will had always been cautious with social media. He didn't have a twitter account and only posted benign stuff on his wall. Then he stopped scrolling down and just stared, with his chin in his hands. There was a picture of Sonny with the wording 'Me and Chad Dimera partying for the New Year's Eve!'. After something like fifteen minutes, Will shook himself off his trance and liked the picture straight away. Then he closed his browser and went to bed.

 

It took him about two hours to finally fall asleep.

 

The next morning, he felt the urge to text Sonny or send a private message or something, but he had no idea what to say and felt dumb. In the afternoon, he sat with his computer and reread the Facebook wall. He was acquiring Sonny-specific knowledge like a sponge.

 

On Tuesday night, after a few 'likes' on posts, he decided to ask what was bothering him. After all that would be a conversation starter. So he texted : ' **Hi Jackson.** ' then deleted and wrote ' **Sonny** ' instead. ' **You said you worked in a coffee-house, not far from here. What's the name? Will** '

 

Sonny answered eight minutes after ' **It's not open yet, nor named. It will be next week.** ' Oh, that explained it... Of course, the grand business project that was writing about! Which is why he went to a different one before, he might have even picked a few ideas.

 

Will was now dry of new conversation ideas. An hour later, his phone beeped ' **So, you're still on for the Hitchcock Fest? My partner Chad is rounding a few friends, I would love it if you could come.** ' Between the 'partner' word and the L one, Will was getting too upset to process. He calmed down, remembered that Sonny probably had a business partner (he had written he was single) and calmed down enough to write back. After four starts, he managed ' **Which evening?** ' ' **Tomorrow.** '

 

So the next day, Will walked to the coffee-house just to order something to calm his nerves. In a few hours, he was seeing Sonny again. It felt like he had won the lottery.

 


	13. Chapter 13

Will came in the coffee-house and walked straight to the counter. There was no need to go to 'his' booth today. He knew what Sonny looked like now, and he was very happy he did. Just remembering his warm eyes was enough to make him forget his surrounding and count the minutes till he would see him again. Which is why, when the barista handed him his order and asked him something, he was startled. “Hello, sir, not going to your usual booth?” He smiled politely and shook his head but she insisted “I think you should go.” and winked at him. For a second, Will wondered if she was hitting on him, but turned anyway. He saw a mane of black hair and his heartbeat accelerated. “Thanks, I'll... just go there.” He walked a few steps, realized he had forgotten to pay, turned back, then half-ran to Sonny.

 

He sat opposite him, grinning at the gorgeous man sipping his coffee, whose eyes widened. He choked on his cup and coughed. Will tapped his back, embarrassed and ecstatic that he could touch his crush. He still had to try and remember the letter, how Sonny had expressed his desire to date him. After a few seconds, he pulled his hand away, feeling ruffled by his own boldness.

When Sonny calmed down enough from his fit, he whispered “Hello, sir. Fancy meeting you here.” Will chuckled, embarrassed, but joining in the joke anyway “Well, I like to sit here. You never know what you may find behind the seat.”

 

“So, we never cross path for the past weeks and now we've met, we come at the same time. Looks like we're in sync.” Sonny's smile was playful. “Does that mean we can spend the afternoon together?” Will asked hopeful. Sonny frowned “I'm afraid not. I took a break but I have to go back. We're opening soon and it has to be ready.” Will bit his lower lip. He was coming across as too keen. There was no need to freak Sonny out. After all, he was attracted to Will and they had shared deep stuff but he didn't know him, not really.

 

Sonny finished his coffee, cleaned the mess he had made on the table with a napkin, then took his jacket. “I'm glad to have seen you though. It'll make the waiting for tonight easier.” He paused and added in a softer shyer voice “You want me to... I mean, I can pick you up if you want. Around 6?” Will didn't feel up to answering, so he just nodded his assent. Sonny started leaning, but stopped and awkwardly patted Will's shoulder. Said shoulder became suddenly very warm. Will bit his lip, trying to gather the courage to pat back or kiss Sonny's cheek or something, but he was frozen. He watched Sonny leave after shooting an insanely beautiful smile.

 

Will's nerves had reached newer peaks of tension, so he decided to take a walk near the canal. His phone rang. It was his father.

 

“So, Will, how was your week-end? I figure you didn't go to this ridiculous gay outing. Did you go see your sister?” Will closed his eyes. There was a faltering in his father's voice he didn't like, especially so early in the day. Lucas had been sober for a few years now, but recently he had been drinking again. It was mostly on social occasions and never much but when Will was present, he had trouble remembering to breathe. He had been a little boy afraid to be near his dad. Lucas wasn't violent, even drunk but he was pathetic and unable to take care of himself or his young son.

 

So Will hesitated. If he came out to his dad, would that send him overboard? He didn't think he could accept being the trigger to his father's relapse. On the other hand, Will was a grown-up now, he needed to live his own truth. And if Sonny was ever to become an important part of his life (he hoped like hell it could happen), then at one point he would have to meet Lucas.

 

“Actually, I did go, dad, and it had a good time. Nobody came on to me and I've learned a lot.” He wasn't lying, not really. Sonny had been a gentleman and Tyler's boyfriend, well... “You're the one who taught me to respect others and to show compassion. Does it not apply to everyone?” He heard a sigh “Of course it does. But be careful. People talk and tend to judge quickly. You wouldn't want to be mistaken as gay, right?” Will sighed too, more discreetly “Anyway, I have to go dad. See you later?” “You can come tomorrow night. Your grandma invited us.”

 

The one good thing was that Will didn't have an outfit-choosing crisis. He would wear comfy, casual clothes and that was it. It gave him ample time to take a shower, style his hair, change his mind, clean his hair again and try a few other things, until it was almost 6 and he was still not dressed. He ran downstairs but slowed down near the building entrance. He felt horribly self-conscious, seeing he was not only about to meet Sonny again, but also his friends, who weren't interested in dating him, so would be more likely to judge him.

 

He was suddenly reminded of Gaby, like some of these memories that hit you and feel very real. He remembered her gradual coolness and detachment, the way she frowned at him, the way she looked ashamed in her friend's presence. At the time, he had not really been aware of all that. Sticking to the relationship when it clearly wasn't working had hurt him as much as his repressed sexuality had hurt her. He wasn't so naive as to think that dating guys would mean this kind of behavior would never happen. But when he thought about Sonny's kindness, not only toward him but toward all the weekend attendees, he felt he could let go part of his fears.

 

The eyes he met first weren't Sonny's though. They were open big and round in surprise then turned to the inside of the car, then back at Will. Will had a nervous relieved smile. “Well, Will, the way Sonny's eye sparkled when he told me we were picking up someone here, I had no idea that applied to you...” Will could see she was shoved by the driver but she smirked and went on “Anyway, I called shotgun, but I may surrender the front seat to a friend.” She grinned at Will, as she exited the car and went to hug him. Will let out a small sigh. One of Sonny's friends down, who was okay with him.

 

He climbed in the car and sat next to a very red-faced Sonny. “Hi again.” Will ventured. “Hi Will. You know Tracy of course and this is Chad...” A guy so tall he was slumped in the car waved from the back seat “... and Abby, my cousin. And this is Brian...” Next to a smiling gorgeous blond girl, Will saw a guy with blue eyes, like him, who looked cold and disdainful. The name was very familiar to Will of course, not only from the letters but also from Facebook as he had noticed him on Sonny's friend's list. There hadn't been a photo of him though. Will gulped. The guy was very handsome and well-framed. Will instantly didn't like him as he seemed so arrogant. An uneasy feeling crept in his gut. He turned quickly to Sonny who looked much more welcoming and put a polite smile on.

 

Will had never seen this specific Hitchcock film and was very interested in seeing it. They entered the movie house as a tight group and before Will could understand, Sonny was seated, surrounded by Chad and Brian. Will resignedly walked to sit next to Tracy but Sonny got up and said “Hey, Abby, why don't you sit here instead.” with his hand spread in offer. Abby passed Will, flush mirrored by Chad's. Apparently, Sonny and him weren't the only one on a non-date tonight.

 

Sonny's warmth next to him was distracting. Will tried focusing on the movie, instead of how much a gentleman Sonny could be, not taking his hand or looking his way, the disappointment and flusters making him want to throw up. He didn't like that they couldn't talk or even look into each other's eyes. _The movie, the movie..._

 

It was a great intrigue and Will was enthusiastic about it as they exited the theater. It helped him start a passionate debate with the others, which continued in the car, until they reached a little building with tarps hanging on the door and the windows. Tracy was out the door and peeking in in seconds. “Looks like you guys still have your hands full. You sure you'll be ready next week?” Chad shook his head “Of course we will. Now move and let me open.”

 

It felt really intimate to be in the unfinished coffee-house like that with Sonny. Will could have done without Brian's presence but he still felt included and halfway to friends. Then Sonny brought him a coffee cup. He was looking at him intensely, as if he was waiting for something but Will had no idea what. So he just drank his coffee, still staring back at Sonny, trying to muster a nonexistent courage.

 

“So, Sonny, will you be super busy this next week, or will you go out again? Cause I definitely want to join!” Brian interrupted them, putting his hand on Sonny's shoulder in a possessive way. Sonny took a deep breath and whispered “Excuse me, Will, just for a minute” and pulled Brian to another room. Will felt icy. Luckily Tracy came to his rescue, along with Abby, who was a sweet bubbly girl and soon they were all chatting with Will and Chad. Sonny returned with a sulking Brian who said “Well, good-night everyone, I need my beauty sleep.” and left with a murderous glare to Will.

 

That made Abby look at her watch and exclaim she had to leave too. The party just broke up with Chad staying behind and Sonny taking Tracy and Will home. Will liked this ride better. Brian's absence and Tracy's friendliness were a plus, even though he was now in the backseat. When Tracy got out, Will hesitated. He asked, prudent “Will you feel like a taxi driver if I stay there?” Sonny laughed “Definitely. Why don't you join me?”

 

They parked next to Marlena's building. Sonny turned his hips slightly, to face Will “So... Good-night...” His unfinished sentence lingered while his face came nearer. Will froze. It was one thing to come out, another to actually kiss another guy, even Sonny. He didn't want to hurt his feelings though and gave him a peck on the cheek. Then he jumped out of the car, babbling “Thanks, that was... thanks... great night... We could do it again...”

 

Sonny looked thoughtful. He pinched his lips and smiled “Yes, sure. I can't wait.” Will looked at the car's red lights disappearing in the night. He felt like a lot of missed opportunities had passed him. It was so easier to write to Sonny than address him face to face. Maybe he could try writing a new letter, just to let him know where he stood now. He walked up to his room and took out his notebook.

 


	14. Sonny's POV

Sonny entered his apartment having just left Will. He was nervous as he unpacked his bag just knowing Will was unpacking too and not that far away. He could be reading the letter right now. Sonny checked his phone. No message. He placed it right by his duffle bag so he could watch for the screen to light up.

 

The afternoon passed and no messages. Sonny wondered what Will was doing. Did the letter scare him off? Maybe he was coming out to his family. Or maybe Sonny had been wrong and Will wasn’t interested in him...

 

Sonny decided he probably put too much in the letter. He debated over which part constituted “too much”. Maybe it was the identity confession. Possibly, it had to be that or the fact that he said he wanted to date Will. He knew people were hitting on Will before and during the weekend. It wasn’t working for them so why should Sonny hope for a better result?

 

Oh no... he realized it must have been the use of the words “delicious torture” when describing their night together and apart in the bunk beds. That was a bit too descriptive but it felt ‘just right’ when he wrote it.

 

He kept checking his phone only to be disappointed. Finally, he gave up leaving his phone in exchange for his email where he received a pleasant surprise. No text or phone call but Will had sent him a friend request on Facebook. OK, so Will did read the letter and he wasn’t running away, just moving slowly. He thought about chatting, but Will was still online and would have initiated it if he wanted to talk. Instead he opted for studying his timeline posts for the past three years in minute detail. The photos were the best. He kept his favorite on the screen when he went to bed.

 

Sonny woke up happy. He could wait. For now he had Will’s Facebook page and a lot of work to do. After work, Sonny was delighted to find a text. ' **Hi Sonny. You said you worked in a coffee-house, not far from here. What's the name? Will.** ”

 

Sonny answered immediately, “' **It's not open yet, nor named. It will be next week.** ' Sonny wished it was open. Maybe Will was going to come see him.

 

Sonny expected a response, but when none came he decided to firm up their plans, ' **So, you're still on for the Hitchcock Fest? My partner Chad is rounding a few friends, I would love it if you could come.** ' ' **Which evening?** ' ' **Tomorrow.** '

 

The next morning was busy again as it was now less than a week to opening day. After working all morning, Sonny needed a ‘pick me up’ and went out for coffee. He settled in their usual booth, but he didn’t expect to find any letters today, of course. They had moved past the penpal stage.

 

Sonny was mid-sip in his coffee when a shadow fell over his table. He looked up as was surprised to see Will, not his daydream Will, but the real one sitting across from him. He choked on the coffee and thankfully Will gave him a few good pats on the back.

 

Once clear, Sonny took a deep breath and then said softly, “Hello, sir. Fancy meeting you here." "Well, I like to sit here. You never know what you may find behind the seat." "So, we never cross path for the past weeks and now we've met, we come at the same time. Looks like we're in sync." Sonny said unable to stop the smile that was brought on by Will’s apparent happiness. "Does that mean we can spend the afternoon together?" Will asked sounding hopeful. Sonny was genuinely disappointed that he couldn’t say yes, as he said "I'm afraid not. I took a break but I have to go back. We're opening soon and it has to be ready."

 

Will looked both discouraged and worried as he bit his full bottom lip. Sonny reluctantly finished his coffee, cleaned up and grabbed his jacket. "I'm glad to have seen you though. It'll make the waiting for tonight easier." Sonny thought about tonight and added quietly, "You want me to... I mean, I can pick you up if you want. Around 6?"

 

Will seemed subdued now, but nodded. Sonny wanted to kiss him on the cheek, and almost did. He thought better of it as he wasn’t sure what Will was thinking or feeling right now. Instead he patted his shoulder and left with one look back and a smile.

 

Sonny rushed home after finally finishing up at the new coffeehouse. He needed a shower and he had offered to pick up everyone so he needed to leave soon. He managed his routine in record time and went with his favorite grey and black paisley shirt so he wouldn’t need to try things on. When he picked up Chad, he was very disappointed to see Brian with him.

 

“Hey, Sonny! Did you know that Brian loves Hitchcock? He stopped by the coffee house while you are out and when I heard what a fan he was, I had to invite him.” “OK,” Sonny replied with reluctance. “I am not sure there is room in the car though.” “Chad and I are slim, Sonny,” Brian said striking a graceful pose, “We can fit one extra in the backseat.” Brian replied with a smug smile as he climbed into the car.

 

Sonny turned to Chad, “Why did you invite him? You know this is the first time I am going out with Will and you know how Brian is!” Chad looked honestly surprised, “Oh, sorry, Sonny. You said you and Will were just friends. I see how it is now.” “What is that supposed to mean?” Chad replied sagely “You are just friends now, but you have a master plan to become much more.” Now Sonny was the surprised one “Well I wouldn’t put it that way, but yes, that is basically it.” “It will be OK, Sonny. You know how to handle yourself, and if it gets bad, I will help.” “I hope you are right, Chad.”

 

Next they got Tracey “Hey guys, are we ready to go?” Tracey said taking the front seat. “No, we have one more stop,” Sonny said unable to hold back his smile.

 

When they arrived to get Will, Tracy immediately gave something away "Well, Will the way Sonny's eye sparkled when he told me we were picking up someone here, I had no idea that applied to you..." Sonny gave Tracy a gentle shove before she could say more. He thought he only had Brian to worry about, but it was probably everyone he had to watch if there was going to be any hope for his plan.

 

"Anyway, I called shotgun, but I may surrender the front seat to a friend." She grinned at Will, as she exited the car and went to hug him. Will let out a small sigh and Sonny tried to figure out why. He was still blushing from Tracy’s admission when Will climbed into the car next to him.

 

"Hi again." Will said and Sonny was struck once again by how gorgeous Will was. "Hi Will. You know Tracy of course and this is Chad..." Chad waved at Will while discreetly winking at Sonny "...and Abby, my cousin. And this is Brian..." Sonny watched as Brian glared at Will. Will froze for a minute and then looked back at Sonny. Sonny gave Will a warm smile, hoping to erase the effects of Brian’s challenging glare. He had a challenging evening in front of him.

 

 


	15. Sonny's POV

As they entered the theater Sonny tried to get closer to Will but Brian was being pushy and sticking to him like Velcro and Will lagged behind. Sonny sat and looked at Brian with a challenging eye. Brian just sat next to him anyway defiantly. Next Chad plopped down on his other side and Sonny looked at Chad incredulously. He was a terrible wingman. Sonny watched helplessly as Will sat down next to Tracy, but Sonny was not about to let his partner and Brian ruin his night. He had waited too long for this. 

 

Sonny abruptly stood up speaking a bit too loudly, “Hey, Abby, why don't you sit here instead." with his hand spread in offer. Sonny was a great wingman, of course. He knew Chad and Abby wanted to sit together, but they were still in that shy phase of their mutual crush. Sonny never did understand how people could be so shy, but it intrigued him. It’s one of the many things about Will that enthralled him.

 

Sonny sank into the chair next to Will and everything felt right. His closeness was rejuvenating. Sonny tried to focus on the movie, but he could only think about taking Will’s hand in his own. He didn’t of course, but he wanted to. For now, he would have to let their closeness be enough.

 

The Will that left the theater was a different man than the one who entered it and Sonny was delighted to see it.. He was talking to everyone, even Brian. He was animated and opinionated and it validated what Sonny already suspected: ‘Still waters run deep.’

 

Sonny drove the group to the new coffee house while listening contentedly to Will debating diplomatically with his friends.

 

Sonny was curious and anxious for Will’s opinion. They met through a coffeehouse which is only cemented Sonny’s love of the local pub, bistro or coffee house. In all his travels, these were the best memories. Will obviously liked the coffeehouse where they met, so his opinion really mattered.

 

Tracy was out the door and peeking in in seconds. "Looks like you guys still have your hands full. You sure you'll be ready next week?" Chad shook his head "Of course we will. Now move and let me open."

 

Sonny watched Will as he looked around the unfinished coffee-house. He wasn’t sure what he was expecting, anything he guessed. It wasn’t just the building, it was also the coffee so Sonny brought a cup to Will. Then he waited and watched, ready to read his expression. Will drank the coffee staring back at Sonny who couldn’t read his face at all. He must not like it. He would be too kind to say anything, of course.

 

Sonny was deflated and it was worse a moment later when Brian spoke, interrupting them “Sonny, will you be super busy this next week, or will you go out again? Cause I definitely want to join!" Brian then placed his hand on Sonny’s shoulder. Sonny’s blood was boiling at Brian’s nerve. He took a deep breath and then whispered to Will, "Excuse me, Will, just for a minute."

 

Sonny then pulled Brian by the arm and maybe a bit too hard into his office. He shut the door firmly breathed in deeply “Brian, what the hell are you doing?” He asked seriously. Brian laughed it off. “What are you talking about? I thought we were all having a good time?” “Brian, cut the shit. You know exactly what I mean.” “No, Sonny, I really don’t think I do. If you are upset, you are going to need to explain it to me.” 

 

Brian leaned nonchalantly onto the cluttered desk behind him. “Things didn’t work out with us. I was honest with you and we agreed to end as friends.” Sonny explained. “Yes, of course,” Brian agreed. “That is exactly what I am doing.” “No, that’s not what you are doing. I see the way you look at Will and you just had to interrupt us. You are doing whatever you can to keep us apart.” Sonny stated, standing firmly in front of the door. “Oh my god, Sonny! I knew you were confident but I didn’t think you were self-centered. I have just been friendly with everyone. Everything isn’t always about you.” “Brian, I wish I could believe you, but I don’t. I see what you are doing even the fact that you are here at all. I didn’t invite you, you know.” Sonny replied holding firm. “Sonny, I hoped we could be friends, but I am trying and you are not. This is ridiculous. Trust me, I don’t need you, so go back to your doe-eyed prey and stop accusing me.” Sonny looked into Brian’s eyes for a moment, measuring him. He decided that was the best he was going to get. “Fine. Just leave him alone and keep your distance from me. We will be leaving soon, so you may as well go now,” Sonny said as he solemnly opened the door and they rejoined the group.

 

"Well, good-night everyone, I need my beauty sleep." Brian said and Sonny was pleased, until he noticed the murderous glare he gave to Will.

 

That made Abby look at her watch and exclaim she had to leave too. With that, the party just broke up. Chad stayed behind to get a head start on the work for tomorrow so Sonny drove Tracy and Will home. Sonny was deep in thought while Tracy and Will talked companionably about music. As he drove Sonny wondered how things had gone so wrong and he definitely blamed Brian. Maybe being friends wasn’t such a good idea. He had hoped tonight would bring Will closer, but he was even more reserved and Sonny could sense the unwelcome distance between them. And worse? Will didn’t even like his coffee. Maybe Will wouldn’t even come to the place when it was open.

 

Finally, he dropped Tracy off and he expected Will to join him in the front, but Will hesitated "Will you feel like a taxi driver if I stay there?" Sonny was again surprised at how cute Will could be. He laughed despite his concern as he said, "Definitely. Why don't you join me?"

 

Will did join him in the front, but all too soon they had arrived and their destination. Sonny turned his hips slightly, to face Will "So... Good-night..." He wanted to say so much more, but he could tell it wasn’t the right time. Against his will, Sonny felt himself inch closer to Will. Could he do it?Would he kiss him or would that set them back further? Sonny weighed the choices, while Will surprised him by giving him a small soft kiss on the cheek. Sonny had been too distracted to enjoy it properly and then suddenly Will was babbling and literally jumping out of the car like it was on fire.

 

"Thanks, that was... thanks... great night... We could do it again..."

 

Sonny knew he was going to have to do better than tonight if he wanted a real chance with Will. He forced a smile as he spoke, "Yes, sure. I can't wait." That was very true. He couldn’t wait for his next turn at the plate. He could do better for Will. 

 

He watched Will for a moment as he walked slowly toward the building. Then he reluctantly reversed the car to drive away. As he drove home, Sonny was deep in his thoughts. His hopes were tempered, but he was a Kiriakis and they were not known for giving up easily. He would try his luck again. Will was everything he wanted and more. Next time he would be ready and he would be sure there was no one around to get in his way.

 


	16. Will's POV

'Hey, Sonny'... Two words, and already he was doubting. It had been so easy writing the notes before. Will hated himself for being so sensitive and easily overwhelmed. He felt he had fallen aboard at sea and was now trying to find his way through unknown depths. And it was so stupid, because Sonny was a great guy. Patient and kind, but as much as Will knew that, he couldn't help over-think their last evening spent together. Why hadn't he kissed him, or held his hand? Had Will sent the wrong signals unwillingly and now it was too late? He closed his eyes and took a deep breath.

After a minute, he looked at the note again. There were two ways he could write it. Either be extra careful and weigh his words, or be simply sincere like Sonny had been. He chose the latter, felling liberated by that decision. The words flew in.

'Tonight was good. I enjoyed being with your friends and getting to see the future coffee-house. I felt kind of honored to get to have a look at it. I'm sure it's going to look great and I may have to change my coffee-drinking habits... It's a pity for the other place because the barista was so nice about the notes and there's a lot of history between us there, but on the other hand, getting to see you all the time is really tempting.

The Hitchcock festival is far from over, so I thought we could go see another movie, but maybe just the two of us this time? That way we could talk more and get to know each other better. Also, I might be a tiny bit less shy without other people around... I guess.

I really want to know more about your travels. I've been to a few foreign parts when I was younger but it was mostly to see family or to go to school. I hope you won't find me too boring on that account.

So, if you're free Friday night, I could borrow my dad's car and pick you up. I hope you say yes!

Will

PS: you still look stunningly handsome.'

Will had been right, it was easier to write this kind of things than saying them directly. Although the new problem was, how to get this to Sonny? He might not go to the other coffee-house a lot now and Will needed to know for Friday. Of course he had all of Sonny's contact information. He could send an e-mail but it was taking away the charm of their correspondence somehow. On the other hand, it was fast.

He sat up at his computer and opened a word processor. He copied the whole thing, quickly so as not to change his mind, then went to his e-mail box and attached the document. As a subject, he wrote 'Behind the booth's chair'. He sent it, closed the computer, then went to bed immediately.

He went to the LGBT Center the next day. After the outing, he knew most of the students there at least by sight. It felt good to be part of a group like that. There were all kind of people, with different interests and personalities, in fact they were some he wouldn't be interested in befriending. But still, they recognized him, waving or pressing his shoulder lightly, showing that he belonged. Will guessed that as in any group there must be tensions and fights, yet, he felt included and stronger somehow. He discreetly took a look at the schedule in the back. Some volunteers were needed to help set up and clean the back room for a conference. Will was well aware he was not "front desk" material, like Tracy. He was shy when meeting strangers and had no experience about the hardship of being gay. Maybe coming out to his father would provide plenty material, he thought bitterly.

That night, he joined his father and little sister at his grandmother's place. Kate was as different as Marlena as could be but she adored her grandchildren. It was easier to be here than alone with Lucas. Allie was showing her latest grade report, which earned her promises of nice new clothes. She worked in design so had lots of discounts. In fact, she asked Will "So, honey, why don't you come shopping with me one of those days? You've been in college for a while, don't you want to go for extra-elegant? I'm sure girls would like that." Will was used to Kate's blunt ways but he still blushed "I'm not very interested in what girls think grandma." He felt the start his father gave next to him. Kate didn't seem fazed, still extorting a promise to let her perform a makeover.

On Friday morning, Sonny still hadn't answered. Will was disappointed. With himself mostly. He clearly had messed up, or maybe Sonny had changed his mind. Will had come to accept he was physically very attractive to other guys, that still didn't mean he would be a good boyfriend.

He was scribbling on his notebook, vaguely listening to the lecture, while thinking about Sonny's smile and trying to gather the courage to write him a text when he felt his cell vibrate in his pocket. He was sitting on the third row, so couldn't read the message without being noticed. It could be anyone, anyway. Tracy had said she would send him the name of a great band she had just discovered and Kate was a great adept of texting.

Will waited until he had reached the hall to his next lecture to take a look at his phone. It was a text from Sonny. His fingers stopped obeying him so much he had to sit on the floor to calm down. He was so ridiculously nervous, he let out a chuckle. It helped a little and the message was opened ' **Hey, Will, I'm free tonight and Spellbound is playing. No Brian, I swear! Just you and me, ok?** '

Will had asked for his father's car the day before, just in case. He hadn't said it was for a date. Lucas was too suspicious as it was and would want details. Plus Will was still cautious, Sonny and him hadn't kissed, even if he dreamed of it.

Sonny was waiting for him near the future coffee-shop, dressed quite casually and wearing one of his heart-stopping grins. Will discovered he had been right, it was easier when they were just the two of them. In fact, during the ride, he told Sonny about coming out to Marlena and saw his eyes lit up from inside. "That's the best news ever! I'm proud of you... I mean, wow!" Will looked away, but he felt thrilled.

They entered the theater and found two seats in the middle. Sonny was as friendly and respectful as the last time and Will as frustrated. Apparently Sonny was waiting for Will to take the lead and while he appreciated it no end, he was beginning to fear he'd never had enough courage to act on his feelings.

After the movie, they went in search of food and walked into a diner. Sonny was rambling about naming his shop, asking for ideas, tapping his fingers on the Formica table. Will was feeling a little better. Sonny was funny and straightforward, just like in his letters. Suddenly he froze and closed his eyes, saying "Wait, wait, wait... I think I've got it! 'Common Ground'! What do you think about that?" Will smiled "I like it. It kinds of sets the tone." Sonny looked ecstatic. He fished for his phone and asked "You don't mind if I text Chad? We've been brainstorming for a long time. I hope he likes it." Will nodded and started eating. From the corner of his eyes, he saw Sonny type, then fiddle with his cell. Will was racking his brain to find a way to convey that he was ready for a little more.

Sonny's eyes were moving slowly and his posture changed, his muscles relaxing. His gaze turned softer, his mouth opening slightly. His fingers had stopped drumming and before Will knew it, they were weaving their ways with his own. He put down his fork and looked at Sonny "Just got the e-mail you sent yesterday. Thanks for the compliment." His voice was trembling a little. Will pushed his plate on the side. He had lost his appetite, his stomach doing somersaults. Sonny leaned towards him, eyes on his lips, but paused when he was a inch away, his breath warm on Will's face.

In that moment, Will wasn't afraid anymore. Nothing existed but Sonny's mouth, Sonny's eyes, dark and slightly glassy, Sonny's hand under Will's chin, stilling it with just the right amount of pressure. He moved his head, kissing a man for the first time ever and it was exactly what he wanted.

Sonny's lips were softer than he would have thought. He was gentle too, respectful, which was no surprise. Once Will had started, though, Sonny took control of the kiss, leaning even more and pressing against Will's mouth with a confidence that was, strangely, a relief for Will. Gabi had always asked a lot from him when they were dating, looking disappointed when he failed to do what he had no idea she was expecting. If Sonny was taking charge, Will was all for it.

He changed his mind when Sonny ended the kiss after an ecstatic minute. He opened his eyes and saw two dark glowing eyes, and a small almost shy smile. Will felt his own smile spread and invade his whole face. Sonny mirrored him and soon they looked like two dorks, only Will didn't care. Emboldened, he slid on the seat until he bumped into Sonny's knee and shoulder and turned his head toward him. He wanted to say something enthusiastic or grateful or witty, but no words came out. Instead he looked at Sonny, breathing heavily and lips trembling, until Sonny kissed him again.


	17. Chapter 17

Even after kissing him, Sonny remained a gentleman. But a more tender one, now, who took Will's hand in his at random times to kiss it gently and brushed a finger along Will's face to push away Will's stubborn bangs so that he could gaze into his eyes. Will was recovering from the event, his heart beating savagely, his brain unable to form words that weren't necessary anyway.

 

Their silent communication ended when Will became aware of his surroundings and caught the hour on the diner's big vintage clock. It was getting really late and he was supposed to spend the weekend at his father's. He was an adult now, of course, but was still trying to dodge Lucas' questions about that evening. “I have to go now...” “Do you? Are you Cinderella?” Sonny was joking but he sounded disappointed. Or maybe Will was imagining it.

 

Will drove Sonny to his apartment building. For a moment, he almost asked to go visit Sonny's place, but he didn't dare. In fact words were failing him whenever the emotions got too strong, and he couldn't talk about his feelings at all, just write about them.

 

Luckily he had a new way of expressing them and he leaned to Sonny's mouth, giving him a very long kiss that had them pass to the other edge of midnight. Sonny sighed happily then looked around with a surprise expression “No pumpkin?” Will chuckled and shooed Sonny out. He watched him walk to the door, then turn toward the car and Will could have sworn there was a smirk on his face. It was hard to see in the dim street lights but Will blushed and started the engine.

 

On the drive back home, he felt a smile take residence on his face. His spine was tickling, his chest was expanding. His whole body was celebrating. Not only was he dating a guy but it was Jackson, it was Sonny: a gorgeous, gorgeous man that was at the same time compassionate, full of energy and stories to tell. Although he hadn't told any that night after all. Will wasn't complaining. They had time ahead of them, at least he hoped so.

 

He entered the building and walked to the stairs. Suddenly, his smile faded a little. Sonny hadn't mentioned wanting another date. On the other hand, he had kissed Will eagerly. He knew he was being ridiculous but he still felt a little insecure. After all Sonny was friends with guys like Brian who were also very good-looking and certainly more experienced in gay... everything.

 

His father was watching basketball, drinking beer. Will tried to walk by unnoticed but Lucas was sharp “Oh, hey, Will, how was your evening?” “Oh... Hum... Great, great film. I hadn't seen it.” “So, who were you with?” “A friend.” “Which friend, that girl Tracy?” Will shook his head, he was getting sick of pretending “No, a guy.”

 

Lucas turned back to the TV and Will resumed his walking, glad he was off the hook. As he was about to open his door, he heard “A gay one, right? Since all you do is spent time with people from this center.” Will sighed “The LGBT Center, dad. And yes.” “Why, then? Are you gay too?”

 

Something in Will snapped. It wasn't as if he could come back from all this. He would always want men, seeing how happy he was after just one date with Sonny. He stared at the tiles on the floor and whispered loudly “I am.”

 

The silence stretched and stretched. Will didn't move.

 

The seed of courage that was growing in his heart finally compelled him to turn around. Lucas' arm was frozen, beer in hand, just a few inch from his mouth. His eyes were wide but not angry. Most of all he looked surprised. Apparently he had meant that as a jest. Will didn't understand. After all those suspicious looks he had sent Will's way... Had he misread them?

 

He walked to the couch and sat on the farthest edge from his father. He stared at the screen, completely uninterested in the match, yet focused and unwavering. He added “I came to terms with it recently. I wanted to be comfortable with it before telling you or mom. I didn't know if you would still love me as you said the other day.” There was a thud as the undrunk bottle was placed back on the coffee table. Small acid tears were forming under Will's eyelids, waiting for him to hurt too much to fall. The absence of reaction made anxiety gnaw at his insides.

 

“I...” The tone was so strained, Will feared his father would lose his voice before giving an actual answer. He waited.

 

The couch's fabric rustled. A hand circled his shoulder, tentative. Will felt his lungs work again, imperceptibly.

 

“I do love you. I can't stop it and I don't want to.” There was a pause. “But I'm worried. Being gay is not all flowers and smiles like they must have told you there.” “I know dad and they didn't, but I feel accepted and not judged which is a lot.” His father's eyes bore into his “Others will and they won't stop there. Some will exclude you, some will fire you. You may get hurt. Have you thought about that?” Will was trembling but he had to make his father understand “You mean I should choose to still be closeted? Hide and have sordid affairs?” “No, that's not what I meant. You could choose to...” Will shake his head as strongly as he could “I can't, dad. I was always gay and it was making my life hell to be in denial. Do you think anyone would choose to be an outcast? Especially in countries where it's a crime? It would be like trying to have a different skin color.”

 

Lucas didn't look convinced “You had girlfriends. You stayed with Gabi for a year. So you were attracted to her!” Will took a moment to answer and remember how he had felt. He wanted to be as honest as possible “I thought she was... is beautiful. I like her company too. She's fun and interesting. I thought that's how you choose a girlfriend, but men... I feel something so different. It's...” He blushed but went on “...physical. With Gabi, I had to force myself sometimes, and we never...” Lucas' eyes were shut and he seemed so embarrassed, Will stopped talking. He got up and went to his room. His father let him leave without a word.

 

Will tossed and turned all night. All the excitation from kissing Sonny had disappeared, even though he could remember every moment, every touch.

 

He woke up early and decided to go grab breakfast at the coffee-house rather than risk bumping into his dad. This time Sonny wasn't here and Will fought the urge to go look for a note. He longed for Sonny and Chad opening their business. After eating a little, he decided to walk there. It was near the campus so he could go stud at the library after.

 

There was a light in the window and Will's heart beat faster. He knocked on the wood panel. Somebody came to the glass. Chad waved at him and opened the door “Hey, Will! Nice to see you again! Are you looking for Sonny?” Will nodded, blushing. Chad laughed and said “Well, sorry to say it, but he's gone for the weekend. He didn't tell you?” No and Will felt a little betrayed. It was stupid they had just started dating. “We need more investors so he went to visit a friend in New York. The guy just sold his start-up company so he could really help.” Chad looked around and gestured towards the thermos “You want a cup?” “No thanks... but... could I leave note for Sonny? He would find it here, wouldn't he?” “Sure, knock yourself out.”

 


	18. Sonny's POV

It was Friday morning and Sonny was exhausted, but still early at the coffee house just as planned. They were so close to opening and there was so much to do that his dreams were endless "to do" lists, which couldn't be productive in terms of sleep quality.

Sonny started the inventory work that was necessary for opening and he found that, embedded in every task list roller coasting through his brain, Will was there also.

He stopped and texted Will to formalize a plan, so his heart could rest and allow his brain to take over.

'Hey, Will, I'm free tonight and Spellbound is playing. No Brian, I swear! Just you and me, ok?' . . . but his heart didn't rest. It only sped up. At least he wasn't exhausted anymore.

About an hour later he felt a vibration in his pocket. Will had agreed and would pick him up at the new coffee shop that night. He was kind of surprised Will offered to drive, as he thought he might not have a car yet, but he liked Will's sudden willingness to set the firm plan for them both. Maybe it was a good sign that he was coming to terms with things and getting past his hesitance. Sonny's head started spinning.

_Oh god. Imagine him ready. Ready for what I want. Just as perfect as he is now, but actually ready._

Sonny forced his mind to stop that track. He had a long day ahead and a lot to do. He was planning to check his email, as he was waiting to hear from his brother, but he ran out of time. He finally finished the necessities and rushed to dress. He wanted to look nice, but it should be a casual date and he didn't want to pressure Will. At the appointed time he was waiting patiently, or not so patiently, at the future coffee-shop. He was happy about how determined and deliberate Will had been earlier and he found he couldn't tame his smile.

Sonny enjoyed seeing Will behind the wheel. He looked focused and responsible and he was talking with a new confidence. He told Sonny about coming out to Marlena and his eyes lit up from inside with pride.

And Sonny was proud, truly, so he replied, "That's the best news ever! I'm proud of you... I mean, wow!"

Will looked away, but it was a new shyness, an assured one.

They entered the theater and found two seats in the middle. Sonny tried to be interested, but respectful. After all, Will was like caviar, perfect and rare, truly, but best if you didn't burst the egg too soon. Best to wait for the perfect moment to pop it between your tongue and the roof of your mouth and Sonny sensed the time was not just now.

After the movie, they went in search of food and walked into a diner. Sonny was nervous and started to ramble about the name of his shop, asking for ideas and tapping his fingers on the table. Sonny began to check himself.

_I really need to learn to separate work. I should be working on finding common ground with Will now that we are finally alone for an entire evening. Oh . . . wait!_

"Wait, wait, wait... I think I've got it! 'Common Ground'! What do you think about that?"

Will smiled "I like it. It kinds of sets the tone."

Will looked sincere and interested and Sonny felt elated with his approval. "You don't mind if I text Chad? We've been brainstorming for a long time. I hope he likes it."

Will nodded and started eating.

Sonny finished his text to Chad and saw the new emails. He opened the inbox and saw that one was from Will. Will hadn't mentioned an email, and Sonny just couldn't resist opening it now. Sonny smiled softly at the adorable subject line: 'Behind the booth's chair'. He read on:

'Hey, Sonny . . .Tonight was good. I enjoyed being with your friends and getting to see the future coffee-house. I felt kind of honored to get to have a look at it. I'm sure it's going to look great and I may have to change my coffee-drinking habits... It's a pity for the other place because the barista was so nice about the notes and there's a lot of history between us there, but on the other hand, getting to see you all the time is really tempting.

The Hitchcock festival is far from over, so I thought we could go see another movie, but maybe just the two of us this time? That way we could talk more and get to know each other better. Also, I might be a tiny bit less shy without other people around... I guess.

I really want to know more about your travels. I've been to a few foreign parts when I was younger but it was mostly to see family or to go to school. I hope you won't find me too boring on that account.

So, if you're free Friday night, I could borrow my dad's car and pick you up. I hope you say yes!

Will

PS: you still look stunningly handsome.'

 _He_ did _like the coffee then, and it's true I haven't told him about my travels yet and..._

Sonny's brains stopped and rewinded. While Will hadn't been direct, he had just hinted at being ready. _Less shy_... Sonny decided that this was the sign he was waiting for and he reached his free hand to Will's and tangled there fingers together.

That got his attention ...

"Just got the email you sent yesterday. Thanks for the compliment."

Will pushed his plate to the side.

Another sign ...

That was all Sonny needed. He leaned forward as his eyes focused on his target. When his lips were an inch away from Will's full ones, he paused giving Will a chance to escape. Sonny waited, giving him a moment, but that moment ended when Will's lips pressed into Sonny's, and it was a lightening strike to Sonny's core. His remaining willpower was broken as Sonny asserted himself in the kiss, pushing deeper, but still soft against Will's warm lips. It was slow and tender but burning under the surface. Sonny ended the kiss by slowly pulling away to look into Will's deep blue eyes as they opened again. This was followed by a bright and broad smile. It occurred to Sonny that this was the first uninhibited smile he had ever seen from Will. It was like the others he had grown used to but with an extra twinkle and a few more teeth.

Sonny watched enrapt as Will moved closer, bumping Sonny's knee with a rasping deep breath, his lips trembling.

Another sign … an invitation ... really

Sonny greedily took the second offered kiss and savored each moment to burn into his memory.

Now that the boundary was broken, Sonny took advantage of opportunities to take Will's hand, kiss him softly on the cheek or lips and brushing his hair out of his face. After the second kiss, Will had shortly announced that he had to get home. As evidence of his untamed giddiness, Sonny made a joke about Will being Cinderella. Will laughed at the lame attempt at humor, but there was more truth in it than Sonny was ready to admit. He was afraid this perfect man would slip away from him and he would have to go on a kingdom-wide hunt as the prince did.

Will drove Sonny to his apartment building. Sonny didn't immediately get out of the car when they arrived as he was hoping for one more kiss to end the night. This was the longest kiss full of wishes and 'I miss you's', even though they were still together. Sonny sighed happily then looked around with a surprise expression "No pumpkin?"

Will chuckled and shooed Sonny out, and Sonny knew he took the Cinderella joke too far. However, that didn't take away from the happy ending. Sonny could feel Will's eyes on him as he walked to the door, so he turned to face Will once more. He gave his best attempt at a flirty smile before heading inside for his much needed sleep.

When Sonny woke, his first thoughts were of Will. He felt fully rested for the first time in a month. He would be catching a flight in the afternoon to go to New York and try to firm up the final investor. Sonny realized that he had failed to mention the trip to Will during their date, but he planned to call him before he set up to the airport.

As he was putting his case in the car, Sonny got an urgent call from his dad. There was a reason he hadn't heard from his brother. Their father explained he was ill, very ill and he needed a transfusion. Sonny was the only member of the family with the same blood type, so he knew he had to re-route and fly to Dubai. It was a rush of anxiety and adrenaline to board the new flight his dad booked, just moments before take off. Once he was settled into his seat, they announced that phones needed to be placed in airplane mode. Sonny complied tucked away his phone and only then realized that he never called Will.


	19. Chapter 19

Will looked at the brand new counter top. There were no paper napkins on it of course and he didn't have any notebook with him either. He didn't feel like asking Chad even thought the guy was nice. He looked around him and spotted a small pile of half-crumpled papers on the floor. He discreetly picked one and flattened it.

 

It was a sketch that had been thoroughly worked on. Will suspected it was either Sonny or Chad exploring ideas for the shop's arrangement. The counter was marked and the little rounds must be the future tables. Will closed his eyes, imagining how the place would look. Mostly, he was picturing Sonny grinning at him, with a cloth in his hand, wearing an apron. His heart beat faster. He turned the paper, smoothed the paper once more, then took his pencil out of his pocket and wrote:

“Sonny,

As you're absent this weekend, I'd like to go back to our paper's correspondence. I guess you'll spend even more time in here since you're getting closer to the opening, so I'll leave the note at this coffee place instead. It feels right, in a way, to change things a little, now that our relationship has changed too. Getting to kiss you, yesterday was amazing. You're the first boy that I kissed and it was exactly what I wanted. I also liked talking to you. It didn't feel forced, even the pauses were okay. I really feel I've gained a friend as well as a someone to date.

I really hope you feel the same way. I was confused at first because you didn't try anything but now I realize that you're just extremely considerate. This is a quality I admire a lot, although this letter is here to tell you you can be a little more assertive and I won't mind. I'm very shy in person, as you must have gathered, and inexperienced, so I'd like you to be my very handsome guide to gay dating.

I don't know when you'll get this note but I hope you'll appreciate it. You can write back if you have the time, or respond with kisses if you want.

See you soon, I hope. Will”

 

Will was bright red by the time he had finished writing. Luckily, Chad had his back turned, as he was busy painting one of the walls. After folding it and writing “To Sonny” on the front, Will wasn't sure where to hide the note. He needed a witness, like the friendly waitress at the first coffee-house. Maybe he just had to be blunt.

 

“I'll leave it on the counter, then.” “Okay, sure, but I can't say when he'll get it. He's coming back tomorrow night so maybe Monday...” “That's fine, really. By the way...” “Yes?” “Are those your ideas for this place?” “Yeah, well, we're still thinking. Why, you want to help?”

 

Will nodded shyly. Chad grinned and took out a folder with the latest sketch. They discussed it for a while. Will was focused on the other coffee-houses he knew and what he would like to find there:

“You could put board games... That way, people will want to stay.” “I don't know. There's the free wifi for that.” “Oh okay...” Chad narrowed his eyes: “You don't agree, do you?” Will looked down and mumbled “It's just... sometimes family will come and board games are something everyone can enjoy, together. When I go out with my brothers and sisters, sometimes, I take a game of Ludo with me.” Chad nodded “Okay, we'll think about it, then. Well, I don't want to throw you out, but I don't want the paint to dry, so...”

 

Will took the hint instantly and left. He was eating with his grandmother for lunch and, knowing her, she would call him instantly if he was a minute late. He hurried to the Pub and reached it just in time. Kate was already seated and waved at him enthusiastically. Will liked her a lot but he wasn't as comfortable with her as with Marlena. He hoped their conversation would remain on light, easy subject, but he had no such luck.

 

“Will, honey, you look so much better than the last time I s aw you! I guess I know why.” Will looked at her, confused. She went on: “You've had a certain talk with your father, I've heard. He called me to talk about it.” Will felt weak. He hadn't expected that. Kate looked serious and a little angry. Was she homophobic? He gulped, not knowing what to say.

 

“I'm quite disappointed in you, Will, you know.” Wh... Why?” “Because I had to find from Lucas, of course! I get that it was difficult to tell your father, but why not come to me? I could have helped you prepare what to say to my son.” Will worked the sentences in his head, then asked: “You don't mind then?” “Mind?” Kate laughed heartily. She was never discreet but Will was used to it. He grinned tentatively. “I work all day with gay designers, Will. In fact, when your father expressed his concerns, I was able and reassure him that I knew some guys a little older than you who were very successful in life. I'm not sure he's fully reassured, but at least, he should stop buggering you.”

 

Will stayed a while with his unexpected ally. As they rose to leave, Kate hold his arm and exclaimed “Wait! Remember my idea of a make-over? Why not do it this afternoon? After all, now, you have a different public to be attractive to.” Will blushed and considered saying no. Then, he remembered that Sonny wasn't there for the whole weekend and maybe he could try and look good for their next date.

 

Their shopping trip was a good distraction too. As he went back to Marlena's, holding the bags with his new clothes, he started to worry again. Sonny's plane must have landed in New York already. Would Sonny call him in the evening? Maybe they hadn't dated enough for him to expect that. He knew that if it had been him instead, he would have called. He was very attentive to Gaby, even at the start of their relationship. Maybe, that was why she agreed to be his girlfriend, even though he must have been disappointing in other areas.

 

But Sonny didn't call. Will spent the evening watching TV, just a little bit nervous. His insecurities were circling around but he fought them off. Sonny was patient and had made most of the moves. He went to bed and turned aimlessly, waiting for exhaustion to beat his nerves. Just as he was about to fall asleep, he heard a text notification. He looked at the clock. It was 3 am. He caught his phone and opened the new text. It was Sonny. A flood of relief washed through him. You didn't break up with someone over text message (unless you were a big jerk and Will was positive Sonny wasn't.)

 

He started reading.

 


	20. Chapter 20

Will frowned at his phone. Dubaï? Where was that? His exhausted mind didn't provide any answer and he didn't feel like searching. What mattered was that Sonny had contacted him even though there was an emergency. So Will was high in his priority list. He fell asleep, the phone in his hand.

 

For a few days, Will only got a few texts, all to the point. Sonny sounded worried so, after searching Dubaï's location on the web, Will, connected to Facebook and sent a private message stating he was available at any moment for a chat if Sonny needed that. The answer was “Thanks!” and nothing more. Will figured the whole family must be gathered together and support each other.

 

He decided to focus on his own family. He took his sister to a kid movie, listened to his mother's whining with affectuous indifference and went as far as send a text to his dad to tell him he was doing well. As a result, he got invited by Kate to a restaurant outing with his dad. Lucas looked lost. Will discreetly checked his breath but his father was sober.

 

“So, Will, have you worn your new clothes this weekend?” Kate asked with a wink. Lucas froze in his chair. Will was well aware his grandmother was doing this on purpose. It wasn't a good idea so he remained vague: “Nope. I had too much homework. I just went out for coffee.” “Oh, really, has the new coffee-house near the campus already opened?” Will frowned. How did she know about that? Lucas looked less tense, just a little bit curious. “Not yet, no. How come you heard about it?” Kate shrugged: “I met Stefano the other day for work,” She shivered when pronouncing her ex-husband name but went on “He said his grandson is starting a new business.” “Chad?” “Yes, you know him?” Will nodded. Kate's marriage with Stefano had been short and tempestuous, a contender for Sami's unions. Will was surprised he was related to Chad who seemed unassuming and kind.

 

The rest of the evening went okay and Lucas even asked Will about his classes. He felt there was a real chance his dad would come to terms with his son's identity and went to bed feeling better although he was missing Sonny a lot.

 

The next day, he finished class early and decided to go say 'hi' to Chad (not mentioning Kate yet. He didn't know what Chad might have heard). The man was at the coffee house, and ushered him in with a proud smile. Will was flabbergasted. The place looked great. Even if he hadn't known the owners, he would still had wanted to hang here. His own note had disappeared from the counter and Will wondered if Chad would think of giving it to Sonny when he would return. He hadn't had any news recently and really hoped Sonny's brother wasn't going worse.

 

“Okay, Will, why don't you sit here and I'll bring you some coffee. That way, you'll be our first customer ever.” Will laughed “Will I have to pay?” Chad smirked “We accept donations, of course, but no need.” “Cool, then I'll have a black cup of Joe.” “Really? I wanted to practice, this is too easy.” Will shrugged “Sorry...” and smiled.

 

While he waited, he took his phone out and checked for new messages: Facebook, texts, even mail. Still nothing. He saw a cup of coffee being delicately set down on the little table. He looked up.

 

Sonny was grinning widely, his soft eyes filled with a teasing light. Will swallowed and blushed. Chad was nowhere in sight. He was trembling with pleasure and shock but managed to get up and stuttered: “You're here. I've missed...” Sonny sighed “Me too. I wanted to surprise you. Was it okay?” Will could barely hold his thoughts together but he nodded. He didn't resist and gave Sonny a small kiss on the lips.

 

He tried to take a step back after that, but Sonny didn't let him, circling his waist gently and kissing him back. They stayed that way for a moment, eyes in each other. Will's heart was beating a disorganized tempo, answered by Sonny's own, that he could feel through his shirt.

 

Sonny took a deep breath, then whispered “By the way, I do feel the same way.” “What? How?” “Your note? The one you left on the counter?” Oh, right, Will had asked him how he felt. It was a lot to take in so he sat down on the couch. Sonny sat next to him, leaving a few inches now and looked at him in wonder. Will felt overwhelmed and asked “So you liked it?” “The note? I did, yes. It's a great idea to leave it there now. We're opening this weekend and I'd love it if you were to visit a lot afterward. I will be very busy.” Will smirked “Aren't you always busy?” Sonny laughed, making Will feel funny and awesome.

 

“I've got to run now. When is the opening?” Sonny looked a little disappointed. Will didn't understand. Hadn't he just stated he was busy? He tried to make him smile again by giving him a kiss. Sonny accepted him but still looked off. Maybe he was worried for his brother. “The party will start at 6pm Saturday. You can come earlier though.” “Won't I be in the way?” This time, Sonny looked irate. “It's not an obligation, Will. I wouldn't ask if it bothered me though.”

 

Will felt stupid. He was really inexperienced as a boyfriend. He didn't know how to show Sonny he respected his time. He took his backpack and went home.

 

He came to the coffee-house on Saturday morning, a note clenched in his fist and put it in the back door letterbox. It read:

'Sonny, I don't know what happened the other day. I didn't mean to upset you so could you explain? I really needed to go home and make dinner for my grandmother who was working late. And you said you were busy anyway. I also needed to recuperate from the emotion of seeing you again. Surprises are great but I'm easily unsettled.

I'm looking forward to tonight's party though. And this time I can stay longer. I hope that's what you want. I think the place looks gorgeous and comfy, you've both done a great job.

I've invited Tracy too. I know you two are friends.

You can contact me anytime until then. I like hearing your voice, just saying. Will'

 

He went to his mother's and spent the afternoon babysitting. At 4, he came home and took out the make-over 'kit' Kate had picked up for him. It really fit him well and made him stand out. He was a little uncomfortable but hoped that it would make Sonny happy.

 

He was ready to leave at 5:30 when his phone rang. “Tracy?” “No, guess again.” Sonny's voice was so soft, Will was melting “Hi.” “Hi.” There was a pause then: “I'm sorry Will for the other day. I had missed seeing you and I had planned a date for us two that night.” “Oh...” Will was stupid then. “Why didn't you say?” “Well... You looked so willing to leave. I figured I shouldn't have assumed you'd be free. I wasn't angry, just frustrated.”

 

Will thought it over. He wanted to say Sonny should have insisted but that wouldn't have been true. “It's still a little new to me, Sonny. I love every moment we spend together but we've only been on one real date. I don't even know if we're boyfriends...” Sonny interrupted, sounding breathless “We are... I mean, we can be... You want to?” Will smiled “Yes. But can we keep it slow?” “Sure. I'll let you get ready, then.”

 

Will was ready and went to pick up Tracy. She talked a lot on the way over. Will was thankful for it. The words “boyfriend” was resonating in his skull. Such a big step.

 


	21. Chapter 21

 Will really wasn't a crowd type of person. Unless he was at a concert because then the music made it worthwhile, plus he didn't have to talk to the majority of the people there. Whereas, here in Salem, many of those invited to the opening knew him. He recognized Joel, and shook his hand, as well as a few other guys from the LGBT Center. E.J. Dimera, his mother's more recent love interest (although things weren't simple of course, they never were with Sami, especially as his father was Kate's ex) was smiling happily, patting Chad's shoulder. Luckily he hadn't brought Will's mother with him. Will didn't feel ready to let his brand new relationship with Sonny be exposed to her scrutiny.

 

Tracy was happily making up for his shyness by talking up to anyone she came across. Will scolded himself and braces himself for mindless chatter when he turned and just forgot everything as he spotted Sonny's eyes at the other side of the big room. It was as if there was a clearing of people between them two, as if everything faded into the distance. It didn't last long and soon Sonny was hidden again. Will wasn't sure how to behave. True, they were boyfriends now, but few people were in the know (Will strongly suspected Chad had noticed even before their first kiss).

 

A cold chill froze him. Maybe Sonny's parents were there too. He looked around in panic, trying to see if he could make it to the front door quickly, when a hand grabbed his arm.

“Where do you think you're going, Will?” Sonny's voice was soft and teasing, tender even. Will relaxed a bit. He remembered how attentive Sonny could be. He smiled and whispered “Didn't want to disturb you during your shining hour. Also...” He took a step closer, as not to get over-heard “... I would love to kiss you but not in front of an audience that big.”

 

Sonny looked thoughtful, then released Will's arm “You don't mind if I call Chad do you?” Will shook his head. Sonny walked to the counter, shouting “Hey, Chad, look who's there!” Chad turned and grinned “Hey Will! Glad you came!”

 

He joined them and started talking, happily and without expecting long answer. Will felt better. A well-dressed couple approached Sonny, all proud smiles. Will tensed again but Sonny was already greeting them while walking away from Will and Chad.

 

Tracy appeared out of nowhere, a drink in her hand, yawning. Will teased her “Can't stay awake past your curfew?” which got him a nudge and a whispered explanation about her girlfriend keeping her late the last night. Will shushed her, pretending to be embarrassed.

 

They were laughing with Chad when Kate saw them and shouted for everyone to hear “Oh, god, Will! You look stunning in this outfit! I'm sure you're breaking hearts already!” Will blushed, and saw Sonny behind her nodding discreetly and winking at him. Will chuckled and decided to finally go mingling.

 

Two hours later, the party began to wind down and Sonny became more available. He sat next to Will and Tracy on the comfy couch and started chatting. Tracy didn't stay long after that and left for campus soon after.

 

Will looked around him. Everyone had left except for Chad who had started cleaning. “Should we go help him, Sonny? Just tell me what needs to be done.” Sonny shook his head “No need. Chad and I have discussed our different tasks for tonight and I asked to be freed now, so that we could have our date.” Will grinned, relieved and excited.

 

The cold air hit Will, who shivered a little. He felt Sonny's hand on his back immediately, rubbing it softly. Will smiled and put on his coat “So, where are we going?” Sonny grinned “Somewhere I'm sure you'll like.”

 

The place was in an ancient industrial bakery, in Chicago. You could buy a drink and listen to the band set on the small stage but seats were rare and occupied. Will didn't mind, the band was great, he was already planning to buy the CD. Sonny's hand was in his, and Will's eyes kept wandering from the stage to his boyfriend. He must have been smiling because Sonny was smiling too and Will was pretty sure it wasn't because of the music.

 

After a while, Sonny whispered something in Will's hear, but he didn't catch it as the music was too loud. He frowned and gestured to his ears. Sonny pointed to Will's glass. He nodded and watched him go ask for a refill for him. He smiled in thanks, a little frustrated they couldn't talk at all. It was a great evening for him and he appreciated Sonny's intentions, but it was not a good way to know each other better. On the other hand, he really liked the band.

 

Sonny left again, this time coming back with a napkin. Will was jumping up and down, his attention on the musicians now, so at first he didn't notice, then he shook his head. Sonny pressed the paper in his hand, so Will took it and noticed it was written. He stopped his movement and opened the improvised letter.

 

It read 'You look beautiful like that.'

 

Will took a deep breath, trying to will the blush away. Sonny kissed his cheek, chuckling. Will took a pen in his coat's pocket, turned the napkin around and wrote : 'Thanks. It's because I'm happy to be in your company.' Sonny read it and kissed him again. Will gave up. He wanted to be kissed again and not on the cheek, this time.

 

“You sure you don't want to stay till the end of the concert?” Sonny looked hesitant as they walked out. Will pressed his hand, marveling at the feeling. When he realized his sexual orientation, he had been prepared to wait a long time to get a boyfriend. It was hard to believe things had happened so fast “I'm sure, yes. I've got the CD now. It's just that we're on a date and I want to be able to talk to you.”

 

Sonny smiled and led Will to his car. They drove around for a while, looking for a place where they could sit and talk, but Will started yawning. Sonny laughed and tapped the wheel “Looks like it's time for your curfew... Would you like to go to my place to have coffee?” Will opened big frightened eyes. Sonny gulped and shook his head “Oh... No, wait, we'd better...” He was fumbling a little. Will took a few calming breath and whispered “We could go back to Common Ground? A coffee place can be a great place for a date.” Sonny gave him a grateful look and drove to the freeway.


	22. Chapter 22

 Will had seen Sonny's coffee place at different stages and each time, it had felt very different. Now, all furnished and ready to welcome customers, yet dark and quiet, holding just the two of them, it had a very intimate, soft quality. Will liked the red color theme and the fact that Sonny hadn't switched the lights back on. Instead, he had lit a few candles, using the decorative glasses on the tables around them.

 

Will felt spoiled. He was a little embarrassed, it was difficult accepting that he could be the one courted, which was such an old-fashioned wording, sure, but one that really described the level of care and respect Sonny showed in their budding relationship. As a result, Will was falling and he didn't know if it was good or too fast.

 

How did you build a strong, healthy bond? Absolutely no-one around him could tell him that, the only on-going couple he heard about were Sonny's own parents and he didn't dare ask Sonny too much about his family yet. He wanted to know so much though.

 

He was so deep in his thoughts, that Sonny had to nudge him, with a chuckle. Will smirked back, relaxing. Maybe he shouldn't make everything so difficult. If he could make the process of getting to know each other playful, it could work, couldn't it?

 

He had started doodling on a napkin without realizing it. Sonny was laughing now:

“Looks like you pick up a habit. Can't use a napkin for its primal purpose anymore?”

Will blushed and answered back :

“Can _you_? Last time I checked, I'm not the one who wrote on the one in my pocket.” Sonny's smile grew larger. Will admired it for a while, then he got an idea:

“I'd like to learn things about you.”

“Sure, fire away!”

“Well... that's the thing... Remember the part where I'm shy and introverted.”

Sonny's eyes turned soft and he put his hand on Will's arm.

“I do. It's endearing.”

“Thanks... But it means I tend to overthink stuff so it makes it really difficult. So I was thinking...”

“Yeah?”

“How about I write one question down and you write one down and we swap.

Sonny looked thoughtful for a minute:

“How would we answer them? On the same napkin?”

“Well, we could answer directly, but I thought we both could have 'jokers'. I mean, there are aspects of my life I don't feel ready to discuss, even with you. So, that way, we could both have an out.”

Before Sonny could reply, Will added quickly:

“I'm not hiding anything creepy, promise. I'm not a murderer or something. It's more that, well it was easier to write when I hadn't met you. You know my mother has been married multiple times, for instance and that is something that has made me a target for insults as a kid.”

 

Sonny had moved from the chair opposite him, to the couch next to him and was now wrapping a comforting arm around Will's shoulder. Will leaned inside his boyfriend's warm presence and sighed. He was getting very upset, having let these emotions bubble up to the surface after all these years.

He fought back his tears, not wanting to spoil his date but Sonny whispered:

“I think the question game sounds promising. How about we plan another date for that? We'll have time to think about what we want to ask.” Will nodded, still unable to talk. “And nothing kinky, by the way...” This time, he let a chuckle escape.

 

He looked up, inside those warm brown eyes and moved his head upward. Sonny sighed discreetly just before their lips met. Will smiled in the kiss.

 

The next few days, Sonny almost disappeared from Will's life. He had been warned but it was still a little hard. Of course, starting a business was time-consuming and he understood that, but on the other hand, he felt his own innocence and insecurities were already slowing down the relationship, so they really needed some time together to get over that. Sonny was very attractive and it was frustrating not to be able to act on it. He really hoped he wouldn't disappoint Sonny. Knowing him, he wouldn't say anything and be kind in any case. Will hated and loved that about him.

 

He focused on school and also went to the LGBT Center a few times. Tracy hugged him and whispered “Good to see you haven't abandoned us now that you've found your Prince Charming.” Will had pushed her away and pretended she was being silly but he wasn't sure he had been convincing as he was blushing a lot. Tyler was single again, which made Will quite relieved as he hadn't really digested the ex-boyfriend's creepy overtures and felt a little guilty not telling him. Tyler was nice and funny, giving Will a few furtive longing looks. It was so strange being desired like that when he felt so inadequate as a new gay guy. He decided to talk to some of the other students, to fit in a little better. But it wasn't easy, as they all used those words and abbreviations he didn't know, or even sometimes winked and suggest something he was the only one not to get. Maybe he could ask Sonny about it. He was already working on his list of personal questions, he could start a technical one.

 

When he came home that night, he opened his notebook and reread it :

'Do you have brothers and sisters?' He knew there was the one that was sick, back in Dubaï. Apparently, he was getting better but Will wasn't sure if there were others.

'Do you like other sports than climbing?' Will hoped so. Something close to the ground, he could manage.

'What's your favorite movie?'

'What's your favorite book?'...

Near the end, he had written:

'What do you like about me?' But he wasn't sure he would really write it to Sonny. It would be nice to know, though.

And finally : 'If you and me were going on a trip, where would you like to go?'

 

He sent an email before going to bed, saying they could have lunch together on campus, have some sandwich outside, that way Sonny could take a break during the week and he could go back to work quickly. And they could begin the question game.


	23. Chapter 23

 Sonny was being lazy. He lay on the grass, stretching, his head just a few inches from Will's knee, his eyes closed. Will wanted to tell him he could put his head on Will's lap, but he didn't dare. He also wanted to begin the written questions game and that required Sonny to sit. For the moment, he looked like he needed to relax so Will waited, taking in Sonny's beautiful face and dark hair. He suddenly realized that his fingers were having a mind of their own and had dug in Sonny's hair. It was soft, very short, feeling very different than Gabi's.

 

There was a purr. Will gave a start and took his hand off his boyfriend but his wrist was captured. For a second, it felt like his stomach went down his legs, while his heart was beating fast.

“Why d'you stop?”

“Sorry, I didn't realize... Are you okay with it?I don't want to presume...”

Sonny did sat down, with a big frown on his face. He didn't seem mad, more... puzzled. He loosened his grip on Will, letting his hand slide over Will's skin until he was only grasping the tip of his fingers.

“I don't get it, Will. You said you have been in a relationship before, right? With that girl? Did you have to ask her that kind of stuff?”

“Yes, but...”

“But what?”

“It's different... I mean, you're a man. There are so many things that are different. At the LGBT Center, I hear the guys talking and I don't understand most of it...”

 

Sonny cut him short with a kiss. Will's messy mind came to a halt and once again he acted on instinct, his fingers caressing Sonny's temple and moving up.

They parted after a minute, lips still chasing each other. Sonny grinned, like a Johnny did when he was given a new gift.

“I'm your boyfriend, Will. You're allowed to touch me anyway you want. In fact, I'd rather you be the one who takes all the first steps. I'm more experienced so it would be difficult for you to shock me. And believe me when I say that all kind of touches are welcomed. I am really into you, Will.”

 

Will got the impression that Sonny was blushing but it might have been a trick of light. They were sitting under the shade of a big oak tree and the light wind was pushing the leaves around, creating pools of bright on their skin. Sonny pressed Will's hand, then added:

“And yes, the gay community has its own codes and culture and you'll get to it but the most important is the freedom. There are no rigid rules, not just one way of living one's sexuality. So we can go at the pace we want, do what we both feel is right. My biggest priority at the moment is respecting you. You're your own person and I won't force anything, ever.”

“I know and I appreciate it. I wish I was less sensitive.”

“No, don't! That's something I love about you Will.”

 

There was a pause, the moment stilled in the air. Will smiled, relieved and fluttered. The first L word. Sonny had a point, it was like being with Gabi. It was Will who had first said he loved her. She had never really said it back, though. Sonny seemed so sincere, Will felt all warm inside. One day, he would know what to answer back.

 

He needed to change the subject and remembered his list of questions. Sonny agreed and took out his own. They were a lot alike at first, easy and mostly about taste. He was very interested when he learned that Will had three younger siblings and they talked about children for a moment.

“I'm the youngest myself. I love my brothers to death. As you've heard, I would give anything for them to be happy and healthy, including my blood and organs. We fight a lot, too, though. I guess I can be very passionate...” Will blushed, hearing this. No matter where the conversation went, they always reacted. It was so strange to desire that much. The mix of emotions and arousal was threatening to make Will lose his mind.

 

He decided it was time to use the more intimate questions. He started with the last one:

“What do you like about me? Apart from my sensitivity... I mean...”

Sonny cocked an eyebrow:

“You mean physically?”

Will was looking at the grass as he nodded. Sonny cupped his chin and waited for him to look up. There was a fire in the brown eyes.

“I like all of you. I dream about your body. Remember when we first met and I saw you with your shirt off.” It was almost impossible to gulp so Will stopped trying. “You looked like a model, like a semi-god. It took all my will power not to kiss you.” Sonny took a breath, then corrected himself “ In fact, it was much more than kissing. I wanted you. I still do, so much.”

 

Will forgot the questions. He forgot the grass he was sitting on, the other people around them. He forgot everything that wasn't Sonny. His voice was trembling but he was sure:

“I'm ready...”

“For what?”

“To go to your place. And try some... discover things with you. I don't know how much, but I want to try.”

“You're sure?”

Sonny looked so vulnerable now, Will wanted to hold him. Instead, he got up and led him to the car. Once there, they kissed against the door, so hard it was almost painful. Sonny was in control again but barely. Will began fantasizing where these hands on his back could go, how it would feel. He pleaded:

“Sonny, drive, now...”


End file.
